Firstly, I must thank Robin Byers of the Customs House for sending me the Information Sheet and also helping with copies of the shows reviews which I may refer to from time to time.

Well hopefully you have read the sheet and so you know what its all about. If any of you are still swithering whether to go then don’t just sit there book a ticket. There are only 3 shows left!

In Summary, its about the people who took part in the Jarrow Crusade to London in 1936. The story centres on 5 characters most of whom were part of one of the “platoons”.   

Firstly there’s Ellen Wilkinson MP, who was speaking on behalf of the men from Jarrow. Councillor David Reilly who was co-ordinating the March. Tashie who wants to have his wicked way with the fairer sex, Jones who is an undercover policeman and Cuddy (of the title) who is the cook and also Paddy the dog.

After the overture, the production starts with a rousing song “All We Need is A Job” which has a strong chorus “We are on our way” which sets the scene showing the determination of the men.

One of the objectives of the march was to hand in a petition of thousands of signatures which was carried in a box. Well in the musical the box plays a part. Jane Holman, who played Catherine’s Mother, Kate in “Tom & Catherine”, plays the box and has rope handles coming out of her jacket and her shirt is covered in signatures representing the petition. She also signs a song about the hopes and aspirations that she represents.

Jane also plays Ellen Wilkinson’s driver and also an unmade member of the platoon. I wish I could remember the context of the line but one of this character says “I thought I saw a Wallaby the other day…..but it was a whippet having a shite!”

Next up it is Cuddy’s turn to be in the spotlight. Cuddy or Cuthbert Miles Errington (grandfather of John) is played by Donald McBride, who played Tom in “Tom and Catherine”. He sings a light hearted ditty “The Netty is the heart of every home”. My wife explained to me that the Netty is in fact the toilet!

In what seemed a bizarre twist the action moves to a scene with Hitler (Jane Holman again) and Lord Londonderry (Tom McBride) that showed there was a pact between Britain and Germany that lead to the closures of steel factories which lead to the Crusade. In what seems like an homage to the producers they sing a song called “Lets all be friends” with a sort of soft shoe shuffle complete with canes.

Back on the march, the platoon meet up with a dog which they name Paddy. The dog is played by David Whitaker, the Mekon in Dan Dare and co-author of the musical. Paddy becomes effectively Cuddy’s dog.

Ellen Wilkinson, played by Helen French sings a song which I believe is called “So Serious”  which is really beautiful and for me the best song in the show. I think it is reminiscent of the song “belle” from Beauty and the Beast.

A lot of the humour is provided by Tashie who as I noted above is after female companionship on the crusade. His tact is that he chats up a girl and when they ask his name his goes all coy but eventually tells them “Menzlie”. They then retort “that’s not such a bad name. What’s you first name?” he then tells them his full name is “Menzlie Humpish!” Apparently, woman feel so sorry for him he gets his leg over. This is demonstrated as he chats up a “lady” again played by Jane Holman. Their bodies are entwined while still standing and he is quite rhythmic. At one point she says she complains about being in pain. He tells her to “hold his balls”. She asks if that will help her pain to which he replies “No but it will stop you stealing stuff out his pockets!”

Following this is an ensemble piece playing what amounts to a skiffle tune just before the break. I couldn’t really make out the name of the song but I vaguely recall it had the line “Bonnie played away” in it. There’s a washboard, a whistle, a bass made out a tea chest, a brush handle and rope while Cuddy plays the spoons.  

I think at this point Paddy has gone missing. We then hear barking followed by howling and Cuddy says “Ah Menzlie Humpish”.

And that (I think) was the end of the 1^st half.

To Be Continued……..