The Last Exit for the Metallic Onslaught - January 20, 2007
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Metallic Onslaught - 89.7FM Geneva, NY / 88.1FM in Ithaca, NY
Friday's 9pm - 2am Eastern Time
www.MetallicOnslaught.TheLastExit.org - www.weos.org
Request Line: (315) 781-3897

The Last Exit for the Lost - WVBR 93.5 FM / East Hill 105.5 FM - Ithaca, NY
Saturday's at Midnight till 6am Sunday - Eastern Time
www.TheLastExit.org - www.WVBR.Com
Request Line: (607) 273-2121
E-mail Requests during the show to: LastExit@...
AIM: LastExitLost666
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** Recaps from Fire Eater Wizard **

On The Metallic Onslaught:

There were: Joe, Rick, Josh (and all of his personalities, who are now
acquiring names, there's Hime, the Middle Eastern dude, Nigel, the
English dude, Juan, the Spanish dude, and I will reveal the names of the
other five hundred or so as we make their acquaintances through their
dialogues with Josh in future, those are all the ones I've heard him
call by name so far, but there are many, many, many more), Lancer,
Jeffie, and one of his 3 known personalities, (he's got a long, long,
long way to go to catch up with Josh), Thor. Jeffie said Satan had
cursed him. The curse was that, if he screams a word (like, say,
GOATWHORE!!!!, for example), then he starts stuttering, which kinda
sounded like a cross between a higher pitched version of what it would
sound like on "Peanuts" whenever any adult was talking, and a CD when
it's stuck and is doing the equivalent of a record (if any of you out
there actually remember vinyl records) skipping. Well, maybe not exactly
like that, but that's the best description I can think of right now to
try to capture it. Violence would get him unstuck, so, throughout the
night, he'd scream something, become unable to speak, only stutter like
that, and violence would be committed upon him. Satan also cursed Thor,
whenever Thor felt provoked, he would disappear into the bathroom with
the nearest victim, and sacrifice them to Satan, thereby turning them
into a zombie, This happened to Josh. This was Thor's way of sacrificing
people to Satan, which he now felt the need to do often. There was much
brawling, what with Zombie Thor's attempts to sacrifice people to Satan,
and Jeffie's stuttering needing to be unstuck...

On The Last Exit For The Lost:

There were: Just Joe, err, I mean, Super Joe, as he still had his super
powers, or at least he did for part of the night, more on which later,
EVD, who was sick, well, we all know he's a sick dude, but I mean
actually ill, with pneumonia, caused, no doubt, by all that time being
stuck up in a Giant Redwood, in the cold and elements, thanks to Super
Joe. Sorry, EVD, hope you feel better real soon. Joe claimed to still
have his super powers. So, to test this, as they still weren't quite
convinced... When TTTP was played... The rules this time were... If a
bullet played, EVD would get to devise another test for Joe to prove he
actually does have super powers... If a bullet did not play, then Azkath
would get to devise a test, so, either way, Super Joe's powers would be
tested... The only way they would not be tested, would be if the so
extremely likely to happen that it is all but a foregone conclusion,
event that Buckner And Garcia played, in which case, Super Joe would get
to use his super powers on EVD... And, btw, the computer now has four
thousand six hundred and sixty three (three songs shy of four thousand
six hundred and sixty six) songs on it. No bullet. And, the unthinkable
actually did happen, and no Buckner and Garcia either. Which meant that
Azkath would get to determine a test for Super Joe's powers, as you know
if you've been paying attention to what you're reading, which you BETTER
be doing! Azkath asked Super Joe to shape shift into a bunny... And...
He did... They put the bunny in a box, thinking that, now they had him,
he was a bunny, and he was trapped in a box. They started to gleefully
taunt him, but they didn't get too far with this, because, in a few
seconds, Super Joe changed back into himself, and, of course, there went
the box, as it was made of cardboard, and, Super Joe may be small, but
he is still a lot bigger than a cardboard box, so the box ripped apart.
Hmmm, now, if it had been a box made out of steel... :) But, ah well, it
wasn't, that must be remembered if Joe is ever in another form and put
into a box again. They told Super Joe that he should shape shift into a
mouse, that that would be really cool, because then he could go across
the street to Gorgar's establishment of employment, and have lots of fun
harassing The Dinosaur, running around his feet, and causing him
distress. Super Joe liked this idea a lot. He shape shifted into a mouse
after asking them to put him in a can when he did so he could be
transported over there that way. They put the mouse in the can. They
said that they knew a way to get rid of Joe's super powers. At the next
break, EVD said that he had taken care of it. Well, at first he said
that he had had nothing to do with the disappearance of Joe's super
powers, but then he said he did. For, indeed, Joe was no longer a mouse,
was sad, and said that he had lost his super powers. And then he
appeared to go insane... Well, yeah, I know, he is insane, but this was
in a new way. He screamed that there were lots and lots of little people
outside. Little people like fairies and super natural beings, and that
they wanted to take him away and eat him. He bolted into the bathroom
and locked himself in there. Azkath congratulated EVD on hypnotizing
Just Joe (because he was Just Joe again) into thinking this, but EVD
said that he had had nothing to do with it. That, yes, he had forgotten,
it had indeed been he who had hypnotized Joe into thinking that he
doesn't have super powers, but that the rest of this, he had had nothing
to do with. They got Just Joe out of the bathroom by telling him that
two large hairy spiders had just crawled under the door. Not having his
powers any more, Just Joe was now again a wimp who can no longer
appreciate the coolness of spiders, so he came screaming out of the
bathroom, then ran outside, screaming about the Little People who wanted
to eat him. Next break he was back locked in the bathroom again. They
told him that they had been outside, looked all around, and there were
no Little People out there. NONE. And, to prove this to him, he could go
outside, with EVD. If EVD couldn't see any Little People, then they did
not exist, and were all only in his head. Just Joe wouldn't buy this,
and was reluctant, saying, that, no, it did not mean that, it just meant
that EVD couldn't see them, even though he, Just Joe could. They got him
to go by telling him that, if EVD couldn't see them, then they couldn't
hurt Just Joe. They went. And only Just Joe returned... He said that The
Little People had taken EVD away and eaten him. That they would have
taken him, but he threw EVD in front of them and ran away. There's a guy
after my own heart, I've always said, there's safety in numbers, if
things go wrong, you can throw your companions at the danger, and take
that chance to escape. Azkath and Just Joe went outside. When they were
back, Azkath told Just Joe that, see there hadn't been any Little
People. But Just Joe said that there had been, and that, if they were
gone for the time being, then it was only because they were off
digesting EVD. He insisted they were real, and they were evil, and
creepy. Azkath told Just Joe that he wanted him to get EVD back before
the end of the show, and that, oh yeah, THERE WERE NO LITTLE PEOPLE! But
Just Joe insisted that, YES THERE WERE! At the end of the talk portion
of the night, Azkath was just getting ready to start The Feature Artist,
there was still no EVD, and Just Joe rushed up screaming that The Little
People were back, they were outside, and they were everywhere out there.
Azkath told him, yet again, that there was no such thing. Just Joe said
that, there was, and he would know there was if he took a look
outside... A disgusted Azkath finally said ok, he would go look, if it
would shut him up, since there would be nothing to see, anyways. Azkath
left... There was a silence, which grew and grew. Then a distressed Just
Joe said that The Little People had taken Azkath away, and that he
didn't know what to do now. Oh, wait, yes he did know what to do now
after all, he was going to go lock himself back in the bathroom and hide
from The Little People. Which he did. But, fortunately, right before he
did that, he did have enough presence of mind left (or what passes for a
mind for him, he had enough of that left) to start The Feature Artist
(and he didn't even screw that up, which may have been an historic
moment, as it may very well be the first thing he's ever done without
screwing it up), which I shall now reveal... It was Skyclad... So, we
shall hear next week, if EVD and Azkath come back, and, if they do, what
happened to them. Just Joe, is apparently going to spend his week locked
in the bathroom. So tune in to find out what happens... Someone will be
there, and, something will happen, so tune in... Oh, and by the way,
watch out for The Little People, and try not to windup being taken away
to be their dinner!
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Playlist for The Last Exit for the Lost: January 14, 2007
(R) = Requested

Background: Donny Darko Soundtrack

Gamma Ray "Dethrone Tyranny"
Queensryche "Deliverance"
Overkill "Nice Day... for a Funeral / Soulitude"
Destruction "Bestial Invasion"
Car Bomb "Pieces of You"
Tommie Griggz "Pansy Drinker"
The End "The Never Ever Aftermath"
Tristania "Deadlands"
Worm Quartet "C is for Lettuce"
Seemless "Cast No Shadow"
Manowar "The Sons of Odin" (R)
Reverend "Massacre the Innocent'
Rob Balder "Don't Shoot"
Titanium Black "Quite a Machine"
Angels Beneath Me "An Angelic End"
From These Ashes "Your Transgression"
If Man is Five "Transgressions"

** TRIBUTE TO THE PAST **
The Sisters of Mercy "Alice (1993)"
Steel Prophet "The Ides of March"
Skinny Puppy "Hardset Head"
Whiplash "The Burning of Atlanta"
Savatage "Skull Session"

Kittie "Will to Live"
Since the Flood "I Am Revenge"
Beneath the Sky "A Grave Mistake"
This Ending "Watch the World Burn"
Helix "Get Up"
Scorpions "Make It Real"
Satyricon "A Dawn of a New Age (Remix by Apoptygma Bezerk)"
Sanctuary "Eden Lies Obscured"
Samsas Traum "Fur Immer"
Robot Goes Here "The Minivan Diaries"
Divinity Destroyed "Forever and Never"
Gang Green "Born to Rock"
Black Casket "Stained Brain"
Destruction "Invincible Force"
Fuck the Facts "The Sound of Your Smashed Head"
Detente "Widow's Walk"
Die Apokalyptischen Reiter "Hey Ho"
Fluttr Effect "Hollywood is Porn"
The Great Luke Ski "You Might Be a Trekkie (Live at Mars Con)"
Snowy Shaw "Evil (Live)"
Sudden Death "Cellular Degeneration"
RantMusic "In a Bag (With Me)"
Kevorkian "Godman"
Sax Myle "iypb"
Savatage "Gutter Ballet'
Village of Dead Roads "Between Grace and the Delusion"
Pretty Maids "Needles in the Dark"
Overkill "Brainfade"
Roland Orzabal "Mad World"
Sabbat "A Cautionary Tale / Mythistory"

Feature Artist: Skyclad
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Local Upcoming Shows

Sat, Jan 20 – The Ollie Emporium, Hosrseheads
Assassi-nation, Haunted by Tragedy and possibly Spacefarm2600

Fri, Jan 26 – The Haunt, Ithaca
Xtreme Soundscapes Vol VI DVD Release Show...
If Man is Five, Titanium Black, Angels Beneath Me, and From These Ashes

Sat, Jan 27 – The Downtown Quarterback, Endicott
Others, Devastation Masters, G-Men, and Murdersquad T.O.

Fri, Feb 2 – The Haunt, Ithaca
Bone Jar, Brand New Sin, Stemm, and Child’s Play

Fri, Feb 9 – Station 58, Syracuse
Bone Jar and Brace

Sat, Feb 10 – The Cortland Youth Center, Cortland
Bone Jar and Child’s Play

Wed, Feb 14 – The Water Street Music Hall, Rochester
Mastodon, Priestess, and Converge

Sat, Feb. 17 – The Penny Arcade, Rochester
GOD FORBID, Goatwhore, Mnemic, Byzantine, Arsis, Fallguy

Sat, Feb 24 - Sherlock's, Erie, PA
Bone Jar and Stemm

Fri, March 2 – Castaways, Ithaca
Xtreme Soundscapes Show
Fluttr Effect, Ayurveda, Kid.Nap.Kin, and Armageddon Monks

Fri, March 2 - The 1st Arena, Elmira, NY
VH1/UHL/WINGZ 104.9 Battle of the Bands Finals
Bone Jar with September's Ash, When Glory Fades, and Stone Soul Foundation

Sun, March 25 – Harro East Ballroom, Rochester
Lamb of God, Gorjira, Machine Head, and Trivium

Fri, April 20 - The Haunt, Ithaca
Xtreme Soundscapes Vol VII DVD Release Show
Bone Jar, If Man is Five, Drop Clutch, and Code 6