The Last Exit for The Metallic Onslaught Recaps... January 14, 2007

www.thelastexit.org
devoted.to/onslaught

Recaps by Fire Eater Wizard

On The Metallic Onslaught:

We learned that Josh is in love with Linda Laven, and that Heather
doesn't even know who that is, and that Josh is pregnant with Linda
Laven's twins. Jeffie and Rick brawled whenever Jeffie didn't do what
Rick said, and Rick gave Jeffie a swirly. Jeffie wanted to tie Heather
to a chair, and when she proclaimed it No Pants Day, he tried to take
her pants off. He wanted Rick's help in doing this, but Rick helped
Heather instead. Jeffie put a bag over his (his own, not Rick's) head
and sang some songs...

On The Last Exit For The Lost:

They told Just Joe that a Shoggoth was after him (Summoned by Azkath, of
course), and kept freaking him out, making him think it was near. Just
Joe and Dave made a trap to catch a Shoggoth, but the only thing they
succeeded in trapping in it was a dinosaur, one named Gorgar. Well, at
least they succeeded in capturing AN old one. They kept warning Just Joe
about Shoggoths, giving him suggestions on where to hide, then telling
him the Shoggoth was at hand. Near the end of the night, Joe decided
they were just messing with him, and there never was a Shoggoth. This
was followed by a tentacle grabbing Joe and dragging him out of the
room. A lot of screaming was heard, and it dragged Joe, with Dave trying
to save him, outside, where Dave thought it had eaten Joe. And then
there was no Just Joe to be found... Anywhere... Dave, covered in slime,
became very distraught, crying, as, for some reason, he likes Just Joe
(he's the only one who does), says he's his best friend. Dave, how sad
for you! So they told Dave, if he wanted Just Joe back, he'd have to go
after The Shoggoth, find them, and bring Just Joe back. Azkath gave him
a knife with Elder Symbols on it to help him, telling him it would get
warm the closer he got to the Shoggoth. Dave wasn't too happy with this
prospect, but they reminded him that it was for Just Joe, after all,
and, if he wanted him back, well then, this was the only way. For some
reason, Dave wanted Just Joe back, and so agreed to work on this during
the week. Not happily, but apparently he thinks Just Joe is worth it.
Again, he's the only one who does. Sudden Death's performance at
Nipplepalooza III, also an Xtreme Soundscapes Show, was The Feature
Artist...