The Last Exit for the Metallic Onslaught - February 16, 2008
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Metallic Onslaught - 89.7FM Geneva, NY / 88.1FM in Ithaca, NY
Friday's 9pm - 2am Eastern Time
www.MetallicOnslaught.TheLastExit.org - www.weos.org
Request Line: (315) 781-3897

The Last Exit for the Lost - WVBR 93.5 FM / East Hill 105.5 FM - Ithaca, NY
Saturday's at Midnight till 6am Sunday - Eastern Time
www.TheLastExit.org - www.WVBR.Com
Request Line: (607) 273-2121
E-mail Requests during the show to: LastExit@...
AIM: LastExitLost666

Video Recaps and More: www.Youtube.com/lastexitlost
Divx Stage 6:
http://stage6.divx.com/The-Last-Exit-for-The-Metallic-Onslaught
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Notes from Azkath

Nothing in particular planned for tonight, but you know how that goes...
Megadeth, classic Megadeth, will be our feature at 5am...

** Recaps from Fire Eater Wizard **

On The Metallic Onslaught:

In the 1st hour, Frizz, The Dooger, and Bob played all sappy glam love
ballads for upcoming Valentines Day. Then they left to go party. Jeffie
brought a friend (there is a sentence that is really hard to believe!)
with him, and, this time, it actually wasn't an imaginary one... It was
Dave, whom, if you also listen to The Last Exit For The Lost, and, read
the recaps for it, (and, if you don't, you need to start doing so
immediately!), you should be familiar with. Dave apparently not only
likes Just Joe, but he also likes Jeffie, thinks they're both good
friends. Dave! Dude! You really need to find some better friends, this
is just so sad! We need to work on that, a project to find Dave some
friends, ones that everyone else would consider worthy of that word!
Dave traumatized everyone by showing them lots and lots of belly. And
lots and lots of man boobs and nipples. Jeffie tried to lift and slam
him, but couldn't, so he called out Thor to do it. Which Thor did...
Several times. Thor beat down Dave. Jeffie said that he had found Dave
in an insane asylum. Well, where else would you find someone who thinks
Just Joe and Jeffie are cool, and really good friends, and sees nothing
wrong with that!? Then Jeffie discovered something... Dave, for some
reason, is apparently terrified, I mean, REALLY terrified, of...
Puppets. Jeffie kept showing him puppets, a monkey puppet, the pussy
puppet, Bubbles, the squeaking purple bird puppet. Dave kept screaming
and running, no one could believe a man that fat could move that fast,
or how a man that fat could have that high pitched a scream! Jeffie kept
chasing him, trying to make him kiss the pussy, spank, err, I mean,
stroke, err, that is, pet the monkey, and talk to Bubbles. See what a
good "friend" he is, Dave?! All this broke, and apparently, killed,
Dave. As, at the end of the night, he appeared to be dead... Oh well,
he's been that before, and, I'm sure, will be again... And the pill The
Angry Troll took last week had worked, it turned him into the opposite
of what he had been... Now, instead of being The Angry Troll who hated
and wanted to kill everyone, he was The Pleasant Troll, who liked
everyone and everything. However, a night of Dave's bear belly and
nipples cured him of that, he went back to wanting to kill...

On The Last Exit For The Lost:

Dave had pills... A lot of pills, and he seemed to be addicted to them.
So, for his own good, they took them away from him, which he wasn't at
all pleased about, but then, addicts are never happy with an
intervention, at first, however, in the long run, they'll see it's for
the best. If not, they were just too far gone, hopefully Dave isn't.
However, EVD became fascinated with all the big brightly colored pills.
And he took them... All... And that children is how we wound up with
hippie, 1960's EVD. Extremely mellow, spaced out, and constantly saying
things like "yeah man", and "groovy", all in a dreamy trancelike voice.
Even when being hit with The Boomstick, he said. "ah, no man", in that
same voice. See children, this is why you don't want to do drugs, you'll
become a hippie. And, to Dave, who told EVD to snap out of the '70's
(even though it was all his fault, as it was his drugs that had put him
there!), it's the '60's he is now living in! That's what you get from
these youngins', they don't know their history... Dave was all
distraught over losing his pills, and desperate to get more. To calm him
down, they showed him something to make him happy, I mean, don't monkey
puppets make everyone happy?! And then all the high pitched shrieking,
and hysterical running started again. Dave, terrified of puppets. Ya
know, we should get him together with the member of Rabid who is afraid
of stickers, they can start a club for people who are afraid of
ridiculous things. Plus, it would be fun to get them together, and show
them stickers and puppets at once. EVD got the idea to staple or duct
tape the puppet to Dave's shoulder, so it would always be following him.
Just Joe was hypnotized and sent into the future 5 years again to find
out what happens to him. Since he did nothing, they brought him out of
it... He began running and screaming hysterically. When he was calmed
down enough to sorta talk, he said that, in the future, he is The Great
Old Ones puppet, and that they made him do things, worse than
unspeakable things. They made him eat people, and apparently that wasn't
a good thing, and they made him do sick, perverted things with dead
people. Apparently that wasn't a good thing either. He was absolutely
hysterical. So TTTP was played. If a bullet played, then Azkath would
send, not one, but two, or at least two, Shoggoths after him in the
future, so that the whole puppet thing wouldn't happen. But, alas for
Just Joe(!), no bullet. They tried to snap Dave out of his puppet
hysteria by telling him Just Joe was a puppet, and having Just Joe,
well, put himself all over Dave, 'til he had forced the fear of puppets
out of him. At the end of the night, we had, a still '60's tripped out
EVD, a still frightened Dave, and a Just Joe still absolutely hysterical
over the fact that he is going to spend his future as The Great Old Ones
puppet. Agent Steel was The Feature Artist...