Hellooooooooo everybody,


     Just wanna say that I'm a little disappointed at you guys. I'm not
getting too many reviews and you know how that makes me sad, right? So,
please... REVIEW!!!!!
     Just so you know, I made the highschool name up. Actually, I didnt make
it up, I just took it from the highschool they have in 'The O.C.' (best TV
show ever, btw! hehe). I just didnt have any other idea and didnt wanna it
to be called Redding High, because that's just... lame... Sorry! LoL
     So... here it is... chapter 40! 40!!!!! Wow... reviews!
yourfanfiction@... or http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

-------------------

~*~ Chapter 40 ~*~

    CHICAGO, IL – HOTEL – MAR. 21TH, 2002 – THURSDAY

             Kirstin dropped her bags on the floor and collapsed on the huge
king size bed. Ashley just watched her.
             “I can’t believe this hotel! It’s awesome! Look…” she grabbed a
folder that was laying on the nightstand “They have a spa in here! With
massages, bubble baths, mud baths. Mud bath! Wow!” Kirstin exclaimed all
excited about this glamorous life she was just discovering. Ashley just
looked at her with a big smile on his face “What?” Kirstin asked Ashley
after placing the folder back on the nightstand.
             “Just looking at you all excited over little things like mud
baths.” Ashley lay next to her on bed.
             “Oh, sorry if you’re used to such things as mud baths. But from
where I come from, we don’t usually have mud baths at our services.” Kirstin
turned, supported her head with her right hand and smirked at Ashley.
             “Well… you’re gonna get used to it pretty soon, because you’re
traveling with me a lot more times now.”
             “Well, don’t mind if I do get used to mud baths.” Kirstin pecked
him on the lips “What are you doing today?”
             “Hm… don’t actually know. I didn’t get our schedule yet. Could
you wait here and I’ll go to Mike’s room to get it?”
             “Yeah, sure.”
             “Good. Be back in a sec.” Ashley pecked Kirstin on the lips and
exited the room.

             After a while, Kirstin stretched and got up off the bed. She
walked up to the window and pulled the curtains open. It was raining. And it
was actually freezing outside.
             “That’s Chicago.” Kirstin sighed and shut the curtains.
It was Kirstin’s first time in Chicago. She had never actually been to any
other state besides California and New York. Now she was probably gonna see
a lot of cities and states traveling with Ashley. O-Town was going on an
almost one month preview-tour to promote their second album.
Kirstin retreated to bed and got the remote control from the nightstand,
turning the TV on. She stopped at a ‘Three’s Company’ rerun.
“Hey, you’re never gonna believe it!” Ashley said as soon as he got inside
the room.
“What?” Kirstin sat up, intrigued.
“We’re going to Redding in…” Ashley checked the schedule again “15 days!”
Ashley looked up at Kirstin and didn’t see the enthusiasm he had in her.
“Oh…” Kirstin lay down again.
“Oh? Oh? That’s all you have to say? Don’t you know what this means?” Ashley
sat beside her.
“That we’re going back to our hometown? Yay!” Kirstin faked a smile.
“Yeah, but… Not only are we gonna be back to our hometown, but…” Ashley
frowned “Didn’t you get the letter?”
“What letter? What are you talking about?” Kirstin frowned too.
“From school!”
“What school?”
“Our school! Harbor High?” Ashley was surprised Kirstin hadn’t gotten the
letter.
“Why would Harbor send me a letter?” Kirstin still had no idea where Ashley
was going.
“Well, there’s gonna be this event. Charity Event. And everyone that
graduated from 1995 to 2000 was invited. You really didn’t get the letter?”
“No… well, they don’t have my New York address. Maybe my mum got it. But
again, she’s moved to another house like… almost a year ago. So she probably
didn’t get it either, because she didn’t say anything to me.”
“Oh… I see… but… do you wanna go?”
“I don’t know, Ash. See all those people again? Not exactly my idea of a fun
night.”
“Come on, Kirstin! It’s gonna be fun!” Ashley played with her hair.
“Yeah, for you, maybe. Because now you're gonna show off to these people,
show them you're a big pop star. But not me. They won’t even remember who I
am. Unless we come together and then they will point out and say ‘Look! That
girl is still glued to Ashley just like she was during highschool.’ No,
thanks. I think I’ll pass.” Kirstin returned her gaze to the TV.
“Come on, K. They won’t say that. You’re not being reasonable here.”
“I’m not being reasonable?” Kirstin raised her eyebrows at Ashley “Come on,
Ash, seriously. Who was I friends with? Just you and…” Kirstin turned to the
TV again “Jared.”
“See? There’s Jared! Don’t you wanna see Jared?” Ashley knew the answer to
that question already.
“Yeah, right.” Kirstin sighed. Jared was Kirstin’s friend for a while, but
then he misunderstood Kirstin’s friendship and tried to kiss her one night.
After that, Kirstin and Jared hadn’t actually maintained their friendship
“And he’s probably a mad scientist now.”
“Yeah…” Ashley smirked. Jared was kind of strange. Not a geek strange, just
a really hard studier and really quiet “But, come on! We have to go! And if
you do go, you’ll get to show off your new pop star boyfriend!” Ashley poked
her side.
“Stop it!” Kirstin asked, trying hard not to laugh “It’s not funny!” Ashley
wouldn’t stop it and eventually she gave in, laughing a little “What’s this
stupid charity event for anyway?”
“I can’t really remember. It’s for underprivileged children and I think
special children too. Harbor has a program for those kids now.”
“Oh, really?”
“Yeah. So…” Ashley poked Kirstin again “You’re going, right?”
“Urgh…” Kirstin hit his hand “What choice do I have?”
  “None. So, you’re going! Great! It is gonna be so much fun.” Ashley kissed
Kirstin’s cheek.
“Yeah, right.” Kirstin just sighed and crossed her arms across her chest.
“Listen, now, about today. We have a radio interview and that’s all.
Tomorrow, we have a concert in a fair and a meet and greet afterwards and
then we’re off to…” Ashley checked the schedule that was lying on the bed
“Indianapolis. Oh, Dan’s gotta be thrilled.” Ashley grinned.
“Why?” Kirstin asked.
“His family is meeting him there.”
“Oh, nice.” Kirstin grinned “It seems like a nice place. Indianapolis.”
“It is. You’re gonna find out in two days.”
“Two days? But you said we’re leaving tomorrow.” Kirstin frowned.
“Yeah. But we’re going by bus, so that’ll take a while.”
“Bus? Oh, God.” Kirstin rolled her eyes.
“I know. You’ll probably get no sleep, but when we get to Indianapolis, you
can sleep the entire day. Sorry.” Ashley said. He knew Kirstin had a back
problem and sleeping in the bus wasn’t gonna be good for her back. But he
couldn’t do anything about it.
“That’s alright. I’ll manage. The important thing is that you’re here with
me.” Kirstin pecked his lips “Ash, this is gonna be fun, right?”
“Of course! I promise you that.”
“Good. Because I need to… you know… get my mind off things right now and…”
Kirstin got cut off by Ashley’s lips on her.
“K, I’ll make sure your mind is off things. I don’t wanna see you hurt again
  We’ve been through too much this last week and we don’t need that right now
  I love you and I’ll take care of you. I know you won’t forget things that
easy. And I’m getting used to your mood swings already.” Kirstin half-smiled
and Ashley continued “So, don’t worry. When this tour is over, our lives are
gonna be completely different. Promise you that.” Ashley smiled big into her
eyes.
“I believe you.” Kirstin smiled at his eyes too.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hey!

     So... how is everybody? Hope you're all ok.
     Ok... Here's chapter 38. I like this chapter. Mostly because my favorite
character is in here, so... :-) ]
     But let me know what u think of it, alright? Oh! I got another email
account. The one I had was getting way too many spam messages, so I just got
another one. So... from now on, send your reviews to yourfanfiction@...
br or sign my guestbook at http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     GTG, but REVIEW!!!
     Love
     Fernanda

-------------------------

~*~ Chapter 38 ~*~

             It was 4:20 p.m. and the club hadn’t opened yet.
             “Hey, Tom!”
             “Yeah, man?” Tom asked when his co-worker opened his office's
door.        “There’s someone outside that wants to talk to you.” Jeremy,
Tom’s co-worker, answered.
             “Who is it?” Tom frowned. Who could it be at that time?
             “I have no idea. It’s a girl. And she’s kinda hot.” Jeremy
raised both his eyebrows.
             “Oh…” Tom got up from his desk and headed out his office’s door.
He knew who it was already.

             As Tom saw her and got closer to her, his heart skipped a beat.
When Kirstin saw him, she smiled. He was so special to her… she couldn’t
deny it.
             “Hey.” she greeted with a half-smile.
             “Hey.” he greeted back and looked down. He didn’t know how to
act around Kirstin anymore. Especially after all he had said to her that
night at the hospital. Now Kirstin knew everything he felt for her. Tom
wasn’t so comfortable knowing that.
             “So… you never came back to visit me at the hospital.”
             “Yeah, well… you didn’t need me. You have Ashley now to protect
you, to be there for you.” Tom half-smiled at her and gazed down. Kirstin
could sense he was feeling a bit embarrassed and awkward. She took a few
steps closer to him. Tom didn’t even have to look up to sense her getting
closer.
             “Tom…” Kirstin started “Look at me.” it took a while for Tom to
do what he was told to “I do need you.” Kirstin placed her palm on his face
and soon took it off “I need you as my friend right now. I know I have
Ashley to protect me and to love me. But I need you to be there for me as
well. You’re my friend now. I always need a friend around. Come on, you know
me and you know how much I love my friends.”
             “I… I wasn’t aware I was your friend.” Tom still couldn’t face
Kirstin.
             “Well, you are.”
             “So… does that mean you forgive me? For everything I did to
you?” Tom still kept his gaze down.
             “Yes. But could you look at me please?” Kirstin didn’t wanna
talk to him without facing him “That’s much better now.” she smiled at him
when he looked up at her “I’m never really gonna get over the fact that you
cheated on me and how much that hurt. But I guess I can relate to that and
maybe I even deserved that.”
             “Oh, K, please, don’t say that. You didn’t deserve that. You
were always too good to me.”
             “Maybe I deserved it, not for something I did to you, but for
what I did to Ashley. I can totally relate to what you said to me at the
hospital. It was a weak moment. I know that because it happened to me. When
I got with you. I was feeling lost, I didn’t know what I actually felt for
Ashley and then I let things happen with you. I never really intended on
having a relationship with you. You were my friend.” Tom wasn’t enjoying
hearing that. So, she was saying they shouldn’t have been? “But I was so
confused that I mixed things up.” Kirstin frowned as she saw Tom’s gaze
leave her eyes “And when we happened, I got even more confused. I thought I
loved you. And I’m pretty sure I did.” Tom returned his gaze to her eyes
“But I guess everything had to happen for me to see and learn once and for
all that what I felt for Ashley was real, that he was the one for me. Not
you, unfortunately.” Kirstin got even closer to Tom “I know this hurts, Tom,
but Ashley is the one for me.” Kirstin saw tears forming on Tom’s eyes “Oh,
please, don’t cry. We were never meant to be. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t
love you, Tom. I loved you too much. That’s why it hurt when I saw you with
that girl in my loft. Because I loved you and I didn’t wanna lose you. But
that had to happen. And I want you to realize that it was not your fault. It
happened because it was meant to happen. It happened because it had a reason
  And the reason was for me to see that Ashley was the one for me. So don’t
feel bad for what you’ve done. From what I see, what happened was good for
both of us. Because now I’m with the one I should be with. And now, you’re
free to find the one you should be with.”
Kirstin took a few steps closer and wrapped her arms around Tom’s waist
tightly. It took a while for Tom to wipe the tears away from his eyes and
wrap his arms around Kirstin.
“Thank you for setting me free.” Kirstin said.
“Yeah, sure.” Tom closed his eyes and inhaled Kirstin’s perfume.

They stayed like that for 10 minutes. Then Kirstin broke their hug.
“So… can we be friends now? I really need you, Tommy.” she looked pleaded at
him.
“Yeah, of course.” Tom faked a smile.
That whole conversation and situation was just hurting him too much. Not
being able to be with Kirstin and still having to be around her was gonna be
torture. But eventually he’d get over it. He had to. He had to let her live
her life happily. Even if that meant that he wouldn’t be her lover, only her
friend.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Helloooooo everybody!


     So... here's chapter 37. Yep! 37! Can you believe it? Nah... I know I
can't... and I still have sooooooo many ideas for this fic that I think I'll
go up to chapter 60. Hope you guys stay there reading it...
     Anyways... this chapter is kinda sweet. Let me know what u think,
alright? yourfanfic@... or http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

----------------

~*~ Chapter 37 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOSPITAL – MAR. 19TH, 2002 – TUESDAY

             Kirstin had to spend another 2 days at the hospital. She had
lost too much blood and, of course, the baby, so she had to be supervised
for a while.
             “Thank you so much, Claire.” Kirstin said as she got up from the
bed after the doctor left her room telling she could go home now.
             “Oh, don’t mention.” the nice nurse said with a smile.
             “You were too nice.” Ashley hugged the nurse too.
             “Oh, it’s my job.” she smiled to the Kirstin, Ashley and Grace,
who were now heading for the door.
             “I guess we’ll see you. Hopefully not so soon.” Grace said to
Claire.
             “Oh, yes! Not anytime soon.” Claire smiled again and waved the
trio goodbye.

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRTIN’S LOFT – MAR. 19TH, 2002 – TUESDAY

             Ashley and Kirstin had dropped Grace at her apartment building
and were now heading inside Kirstin’s loft.
             “Oh, God, it’s so good to be home again. No hospital food, no
hospital smells… Just… my sweet home.” Kirstin stated as she collapsed on
her couch.
             Kirstin was much better after these 2 days at the hospital. The
hospital provided a psychologist so Kirstin would get her feelings under
control. It was pretty hurtful for Kirstin to share her feelings, especially
her feelings of loss, with a total stranger. Kirstin just didn’t like
talking about her feelings with anyone. But the psychologist was a really
nice older woman and she helped Kirstin open up herself. Occasionally,
Kirstin would have some mood swings, but nothing that Ashley would be able
to handle.
             “Yes… these days at the hospital were harsh, huh?” Ashley placed
his bags on the floor.
             “Yes… But thank God, that’s over now. Come here.” she patted the
couch so Ashley would sit next to her.
             “I still have to talk to the guys.” Ashley said.
             “About?”
             “About everything. I haven’t talked to them ever since I got to
New York. My cell phone battery died and they must be worried because I
haven’t called or anything.”
             “Oh, ok. If you wanna use the phone...”
             “Do you mind?”
             “Oh, come on, Ash! It’s your house too and you know it!” Kirstin
smiled.
             “Ok.” Ashley smiled at her “Do you mind if I go upstairs to talk
to them?”
             “No, not at all. You do your thing and I’m gonna see if there’s
something to eat because I’m starving.”
             “Ok.” Ashley pecked her lips, got the phone out of the base unit
and headed upstairs.

             He entered the upstairs bathroom. He couldn’t talk in Kirstin’s
room because it didn’t have any walls around it and Kirstin could see and
hear him from downstairs. So he closed the door behind him in the bathroom
and dialed Dan’s cell phone number.
             “Hello?” Dan answered after 4 rings.
             “Hey, man, what’s up?”
             “Ash! Thank God! Where have you been? It’s been 4 days and we
haven’t heard a thing from you!” Dan sounded worried.
             “Yeah, sorry, man. A lot happened, my cell phone battery died
and I just couldn’t find the time to call you guys.”
             “What happened?” Dan questioned.
             “Oh, man. Too much. I’m devastated. Kirstin is… way worse.
Actually, she is a lot better than she was 2 days ago.”
             “Why? What happened? You’re scaring me now.”
             “Kirstin lost the baby.”
             “WHAT?” Dan shouted.
             “Kirstin lost the baby.”
             “How?” Dan couldn’t believe it.
             “Some complications, I can’t really tell you everything now. I
just wanted to call you to tell you guys I’m ok and I don’t know when I’m
coming back. I can’t leave Kirstin right now.”
             “I feel bad for both of you, man. But we’ve got a little press
tour coming up, remember?”
             “Shit! I forgot!” Ashley hit his forehead “Shit! When does that
start?”
             “We leave on Thursday to Chicago.”
             “This Thursday?”
             “Yes.”
             “Shit, shit, shit!” Ashley exclaimed.
             “Yeah…”
             “Oh, shit! I’ll talk to Kirstin. I don’t wanna leave her. Oh,
God. Well… I’ll talk to you later, alright?”
             “Ok. You hang in there, man. And call me if you need anything.”
             “I will. Thanks, Dan.”
             “No problem, man. Bye.”
             “Bye.” Ashley hung up the phone and just stared at it for a
whole minute. He had to leave in two days. How would he tell Kirstin that
after he told he wouldn’t leave her side?

             “So, how did it go? Were they worried?” Kirstin asked when she
saw Ashley emerge from the bathroom.
             “Yes, they were.” Ashley headed downstairs.
             “Good thing you called them, then.”
             “Yes.” he placed the phone back on the base unit “We need to
talk.”
             “Oh…” Kirstin said, sensing something wasn’t too good “Ok.” she
sat on the black leather couch next to Ashley.
             “I talked to Dan and he said that we… ahm… we have this press
tour that coming up. It’s starting the day after tomorrow in Chicago.”
             “Oh…” Kirstin looked down and played with her fingers.
             “I don’t wanna leave you, Kirstin, but I just can’t not go, it’s
the preview tour before the cd comes out and…”
             “No, you go! I’ll be fine. I totally understand.” Kirstin kept
nodding.
             “Are you sure? Because I don’t wanna leave you alone and…”
             “Oh, I won’t be alone. Grace is here. She can say here for a few
days.”
             “No, Kirstin, I…” Ashley started “I… I know you’re probably
gonna say no, but just listen, alright?”
             “Yes?” Kirstin frowned.
             “I want you to come with me. I don’t wanna leave you behind
anymore. I want you with me so I can take care of you. And I guess I need
you by my side too.”
             “But, Ash…” Kirstin started but Ashley cut her off.
             “I know you’re gonna say you can’t because of your college and
your work. But I’m pretty sure that if you talk to your boss he will give
you a few days off, because of what you went through these past few days.
And the same with college. I just really want you with me and…”
             “Ok.” Kirstin cut him off.
             “I’m sorry, what?” Ashley was confused. He didn’t think it would
be that easy to convince Kirstin to go with him. He had tried before and
never succeeded.
             “Ok. I’ll go with you.” Kirstin smiled at him.
             “Really?” Ashley smiled back “Ok, you’re kidding me here.”
Ashley frowned.
             “No, I’m not.” Kirstin playfully hit him on the arm “I wanna be
with you too. And I’m sure it will be fine with Andrew and college. I really
could use some time off. And I don’t wanna be apart from you right now. I
just didn’t suggest it before because I didn’t know if you’d want me around
you on your tour.”
             “Oh, come on! Now you’re just talking nonsense.”
             “Good. Because I really need to be with you right now. I’m still
not 100%.” Kirstin played with her fingers again.
             “I’m not 100% either. So if we’re together, we’re gonna even it
out.”
             “I guess…” Kirstin smirked.
             “Come here.” Ashley placed his hand of her neck and pulled her to
him “I love you.” he said before kissing her passionately.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Ok... As I kept you guys waiting too long for a new chapter, I'm sending
another one right now. So... here's chapter 34!
     Dont forget to review this one too! yourfanfic@... or
http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

----------------

~*~ Chapter 34 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOSPITAL – MAR. 17TH, 2002 – SUNDAY

             Tom entered the hospital room and closed the door behind him. He
placed himself in the chair beside the bed and looked at Kirstin, tears
starting to form in his eyes.
             “Keekee… I know you can listen, the nurse told me.” he smiled
sweetly at her “I wanna tell you a lot of things… And maybe this isn’t the
best time for me to be doing this, but I’m pretty sure this will be the only
time I have, so… Kirstin, girl, I… we never really got the chance to sit and
talk about what happened to us. I know we had that time at the restaurant
when you told me that…” he swallowed hard and carried on “Well, when you
told me. But we never really sat and talked about it. I know you won’t be
able to talk back, and it actually kinda makes it easier for me. So, I’ll
just say what I’ve been meaning to tell you since… well… forever.” he took a
deep breath and continued “I never meant to cheat on you. Never in my
sickest dreams was that a possibility. I loved you ever since the first time
I saw you coming into Inferno. You just have this… light in you that
screamed my name and I couldn’t stop staring and adoring you ever since. You
captivated me that night. You had me right there. I was yours. But you
didn’t know. And then one day, you noticed me. And I was happier than I
could ever imagine I could be. But then you broke my heart. And left. After
that, we started this amazing and incredible friendship. That’s when I saw
how wonderful and amazing you are in the inside too. You make me laugh, you
make me feel good… And we got together once again. And that time, I wanted
to make sure you’d be mine. All mine. For eternity. But I knew that was just
a dream of mine. I could never have you forever. That would just be asking
too much. You were too much for me. I knew it since the beginning. But I had
to take a chance. So I proposed. And when you said yes, I was sure you were
kidding, or I was dreaming or something other than reality. But no, you
loved me enough to accept my offer. And we got engaged. God, that was like…
the time of my life. When I thought life couldn’t be any better, you
accepted my proposal. I was gonna have an amazing life full of love and
happiness. And you, the girl of my dreams, was having that life with me. And
then…” he looked down, ashamed “I don’t know what came over me. That girl
you saw me with in our… I mean, your loft, she was just this girl that was
constantly at Luna and wouldn’t stop flirting with me. No matter how much
I’d dismiss her, telling I was engaged and all, she just wouldn’t stop. But
I’ve never really done anything until that day. I swear to you that was the
only time we ever got together. I know…” he looked down again “That’s not
gonna make things any better, but we just got together that time. And I
didn’t even know what came over me that night to do that. I was so happy
with you, Kirstin. So happy. That’s why I can’t come up with a reason for
why I did it. Because, honestly? I don’t have one. Just other than I’m
stupid. I’m the stupidest person in this whole world for losing you over a
weakness moment. That’s what it was. A weakness moment. But I’m glad you
caught me with her. You know why?” he looked tenderly at her “Because you’re
so much better off without me.” Tom let a tear fall again. It was hard
admitting that “I can see that Ashley is the one for you. I guess I always
have. I was just afraid you were gonna see it too and leave me. That you
were gonna wake up one day and realize that you were with the wrong guy.
Ashley was the one for you and you had no idea why you were with me. Because
I wondered that myself so many times. I didn’t know why you were with me
when you clearly loved Ashley. And Ashley cleared loved you back. But I
couldn’t let that happen, I couldn’t let you leave me for him. That’s what I
was always afraid during our relationship. That’s why I always hated Ashley
and always wanted to keep him away from you. Because maybe, if you wouldn’t
see him, you wouldn’t feel anything for him. But I was just kidding myself,
I guess. I saw it sometimes, but the thought of you with Ashley hurt me so
much that I would overlook it, pretend I wasn’t noticing it. And it worked
for a while, while we were together. My pride was my worst enemy during our
relationship, I guess. But our relationship is over now. And so is my pride.
Now, it hurts to see you with Ashley, of course it hurts. I still… love you,
Kirstin. But I know you will never give me another chance and I wouldn’t
even ask for another chance because I don’t deserve it. So, all I really am
looking forward now is for your life to be better. I wanted to be part of it
  That’s one of the reasons I was so excited about… our baby. Because we
would still have a life together, our baby would be our link. But now… It’s
over. We lost our baby and I’m sure I lost the chance of us being together
somehow. I lost it all when we lost our baby. And it hurts too much. Because
our baby represented so much.” Tom couldn’t control the tears running down
his face “But that’s ok. You’re gonna move on, Ashley is gonna be by your
side as he has always been. You’ll be fine. And that’s what I want. You to
be fine. I just hope you forgive me some day. That’s all I hope for. To have
your forgiveness.” Tom wiped the tears away, looked at Kirstin, leaned in to
kiss her on the cheek and got up, leaving the room.

             “G, you can go now.” Tom informed as he got to the waiting room.
             Grace got up without saying a word and trailed to Kirstin’s
hospital room.
             “So, how did it go?” Ashley asked when Tom sat beside him on the
couch.
             “Tough too.” he nodded.
             “Yeah… I can see that.” Ashley said after realizing Tom’s face
was redder than it was when he left to go to Kirstin’s room.
             “Dude, I just… wanted to tell you that I’m sorry for all the
stupid things I did to you while I was with Kirstin.”
             “Hey, man, don’t worry.” Ashley looked up at him.
             “No, I really am sorry. I know I did some fucked up things, like
hit you and argue with you over stupid things and all… I was basically… a
jerk.” Tom recognized.
             “Yes, you basically were.” Ashley agreed and smirked at Tom.
             “Yeah…” Tom smirked too “And I’m sorry. It’s just that I…”
             “Love her, right?” Ashley asked, serious.
             “Yeah…” Tom nodded and looked down.
             “I know, man. And I was a jerk sometimes too. And I’m also sorry
for that.”
             “Yeah, you were a jerk sometimes.” Tom chuckled.
             “I know. But I only did it because I…”
             “Love her. Yeah.” Tom completed Ashley’s sentence “Man, what it
is about Kirstin, huh?”
             “I don’t know. But it’s definitely something.” they both just
nodded.
             “So, we’re cool?” Tom asked, giving out his hand for Ashley.
             “Yeah, we’re cool.” Ashley shook on it.
             “Great. Listen, I think I’m gonna go. Do you think it’s fine if
I go?”
             “Are you sure you wanna go? You don’t have to.” Ashley told him.
             “No. I already told Kirstin how I feel about all this. And I
don’t really think I’m gonna be able to be strong for her when she wakes up.
I’m pretty shook up right now. I really don’t think I’m gonna be able to
handle it too well when she wakes up. I’m gonna fall apart and I know it.”
             “Yes, it’s gonna be tough.”
             “But you’ll be able to do that, dude. I know that. That’s why I
feel comfortable leaving. She has you to be her rock. She doesn’t need me
for anything else now that the baby… well…” Tom looked down again.
             “Hey, it’s not just because the baby is…” Ashley controlled his
emotions and continued “That you won’t be seeing her anymore. You’re friends
and I get that now. So, just come over whenever you feel like it, alright?”
             “Really?” Tom asked.
             “Yeah, sure.”
             “That’s so good to hear, man.” Tom breathed relieved and Ashley
smiled at him “But let me go now, man. We’ll talk, I guess?” Tom stood up.
             “Yeah, sure.” Ashley got up too.
             “Ok, then. Then, see ya.” Tom shook Ashley’s hand. Then he turned
around and left.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hey you guys...

     Ok... so I was on GenerationPop.net just now, because I read someone's
post about her story been nominated for fic of the month there. So I went in
to vote and to see how I could put my own fic to enter the contest. And for
my surprise, I was going thru the nominees list and I saw my fic, "Life With
Him" there! Like... what happened? Who put it there and why wasn't I
informed? LoL
     Anyways... so, I'd like to ask you guys this HUGE favor of voting for me
  I know I probably won't win, because I never really win anything (hehehe
Poor me! hehehe), but it would be pretty cool to see my name as the winner.
Just for a change. :)
     So, if you guys read my fic "Life With Him" and if you guys like it,
could you PLEASE go to the website and vote? The URL is: http://67.60.248
176/gp/fanfiction/index.php?file=awards\monthstory\monthstory
Just search for "Life With Him - Fernanda" in 'Story name' and then put your
info there. It would only take a minute and it would mean ssooooo much to
me!
     Let me go now... but we'll talk. I'm sending chapter 32 out today, so...
:)
     Love
     Fernanda

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hey you guys...

     Ok... so I was on GenerationPop.net just now, because I read someone's
post about her story been nominated for fic of the month there. So I went in
to vote and to see how I could put my own fic to enter the contest. And for
my surprise, I was going thru the nominees list and I saw my fic, "Life With
Him" there! Like... what happened? Who put it there and why wasn't I
informed? LoL
     Anyways... so, I'd like to ask you guys this HUGE favor of voting for me
  I know I probably won't win, because I never really win anything (hehehe
Poor me! hehehe), but it would be pretty cool to see my name as the winner.
Just for a change. :)
     So, if you guys read my fic "Life With Him" and if you guys like it,
could you PLEASE go to the website and vote? The URL is: http://67.60.248
176/gp/fanfiction/index.php?file=awards\monthstory\monthstory
Just search for "Life With Him - Fernanda" in 'Story name' and then put your
info there. It would only take a minute and it would mean ssooooo much to
me!
     Let me go now... but we'll talk. I'm sending chapter 32 out today, so...
:)
     Love
     Fernanda

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Helloooooooooooo,


     So... chapter 31 now. Yep, that was fast!
     Thank you guys sooooo much for your reviews again. You guys are kicking
ass! THANK YOU!!!
     And... this chapter is a bit... I dont know... you kinda feel the
tension I guess... Well... I know I did! LoL
     So... REVIEW!!!! yourfanfic@... or http://myfanfictionsite.cjb
net
     Love
     Fernanda

-------------

~*~ Chapter 31 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOSPITAL – MAR. 17TH, 2002 – SUNDAY

             It was 3 pm when the doctor entered Kirstin’s room.
             “Hello.” he said closing the door behind him.
             “Hi.” Ashley and Kirstin greeted in unison.
             “So… I’m gonna have to take Miss Addams now, Mister…?” the
doctor frowned.
             “Angel.” Ashley answered, getting up.
             “Oh, you’ve got an Angel with you, Miss Addams? What do you need
me for? And why are we worried?” the doctor kidded and Ashley and Kirstin
smiled “So, I’m taking you to run the tests. We’re gonna do the ultrasound
and collect some blood. Ok?”
             “Yes.” Kirstin nodded.
             “So, I’m gonna ask the nurse to take you to the ultrasound room,
alright?”
             “Ok.” Kirstin nodded.
             “Then I’ll meet you there.” the doctor smiled and closed the
door.
             “I’ll be right here, ok, baby? When you finish the tests, I’ll
be waiting right here, alright?” Ashley wanted to make sure Kirstin knew he
wasn’t gonna leave her.
             “Ok.” Kirstin smiled. She knew he wasn’t going anywhere.
             Two nurses, came in, took off what was monitoring Kirstin’s and
the baby’s hearts, lifted Kirstin up and placed her on a gurney.
             “I think I can walk.” Kirstin informed them.
             “Oh, no, you still can’t. Until the doctor runs the tests, he
said you should be lying down. The baby might start to move rapidly again.
So we can’t take any risks until we are certain there are no risks.”
             “Ok.” Kirstin agreed and looked at Ashley as they started to
take her out of the room “Bye, Ash.” she waved at him and he waved back.

             After an hour or so, Ashley was pacing around the room.
             “Why is it taking so long? Wasn’t it some standard tests?” he
rubbed his forehead, worried.
             Tired of waiting in the room, he headed outside and went to get
some information.

             “I’m sorry.” he said to a nurse at the reception “Could you
please tell me if Kirstin Addams is ok? She went in to do some tests but
it’s taking too long.”
             “What’s the name of the patient again?” the elderly nurse asked,
going through the computer files.
             “Kirstin Addams.”
             “Hm.” the nurse looked over her glasses “It says here that she
was scheduled for surgery right about now.”
             “What?” Ashley shouted “That can’t be. She just went in an hour
ago to do some tests, ultrasound and that was it. She can’t possibly be in
surgery. Can you check that again, please?” Ashley asked nervous.
             “Well, it says here that she was taken to surgery 30 minutes ago
” the nurse looked from the computer back to Ashley.
             “But… I… what… I mean…” Ashley was confused. What did she mean
by surgery? Why was Kirstin in a surgery? She was completely fine just a few
hours ago “Why? Why is she having surgery?” Ashley still couldn’t understand
  The nurse’s words just didn’t make any sense to him.
             “That’s all it says here, sir. That’s all they’ve given to us.
There’s nothing else I can tell you. Just the people inside the Operating
Room would be able to tell you more about that.”
             “Yeah? And where can I find these people? When will they be
leaving the Operating Room?” Ashley was starting to shake. Operation?
             “I don’t know, sir. There’s not a predetermined time for that.
It depends on her state.”
             “And how is she? Doesn’t it tell in your computer why she was
taken to the Operating Room? Because, for me, she was fine a few hours ago.
I was in the room with her and she was fine!”
             “I already told you all I know, sir. I know you’re worried, but
there’s nothing else I can tell you, because I seriously don’t know. I don’t
have that kind of information.” the nurse was trying to be nice to Ashley.
She could see in his face that he was truly worried.
             “Fine. Thank you.” Ashley thanked and left.

             On the way to the room, he searched the place to see if he’d
find the doctor or Claire or the nurses that took Kirstin to do the tests.
But he didn’t find anyone.
He entered the room and searched for Kirstin’s cell found. He found it on
the table, beside Andrew’s flowers.
“Ok… Ok… Calm down, Ashley.” he said to himself, looking for Grace’s phone
number. When he found it, he just pressed ‘send’ and waited.
“Hello?” he heard Grace’s voice.
“Grace, it’s me.” he said as if he was in a hurry.
“Ashley. What’s wrong?” Grace knew that he wouldn’t be calling if everything
was fine.
“It’s Kirstin. She is going through surgery right now!” Ashley now sounded
mad.
“What?” Grace shouted.
“I don’t know what happened!” he felt like crying “They took her to do the
damn tests. Then it’s been an hour and I went to ask someone for information
and they just told me she went into surgery 30 minutes ago!”
“But… why?” Grace’s voice was starting to sound shakey.
“I don’t know! They can’t tell me. They don’t know. Can you come here?”
“Of course! I’ll be right over.”
“Oh… and… can you call Tom and let him know too?” Ashley asked.
“Yeah, sure. We’ll both be there soon.”
“Ok. Hurry up. Please.”
             “Of course. Bye.”
             “Bye.” Ashley said and hung up.

             Ashley couldn’t stand being in that room anymore. Kirstin was
going through surgery and he wouldn’t just stay there. He had to get some
sort of information about Kirstin. He had to do something.
             Ashley ran out of the room and started to look again for the
familiar nurses and the doctor. But still, couldn’t find anyone. He then saw
a sign that read ‘Chapel’.

             Ashley stepped into this little Chapel. It had a big illuminated
cross right in front of the door and 4 benches. He sat on the last bench and
stared at the cross. After a while, he knelt down and put his hands together

             “Oh, God. Oh, God.” he started speaking “I don’t even know… Oh,
God. Ok. All I ask right now is for Kirstin’s life. And the baby’s life. I
have no idea what is going on. They just took her to surgery and they can’t
tell me anything!” Ashley hit the bench, but soon took a deep breath and got
it under control “Oh, God. Please, just… let Kirstin and the baby be ok.
Please. That’s all I ask. I can’t lose Kirstin now. I just can’t. She is my
life. I’m nothing without her. I’m worthless without her. It’s for her that
I wake up every morning and you, God, better than anyone else, know that.
You can’t take her from me. Please, God. Please.” tears were taking over
Ashley’s face now.
He took a deep breath and sat back on the bench. He wiped the tears away and
stared at the cross for a few more minutes. He then stood up and left the
Chapel.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Ok people...

     Here's chapter 32 of my fic... Hope you guys enjoyed chapter 31. Pretty
emotional, dont you think? Just this one is just as good. At least that's
what I think! :)
     Anyways... REVIEW!!!! yourfanfic@... or http://myfanfictionsite
cjb.net
     And did you vote on my fic at GenerationPop.net? Hope so! :)
     GTG, but revieeeeewwwww!!!
     Love
     Fernanda

---------------

~*~ Chapter 32 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOSPITAL – MAR. 17TH, 2002 – SUNDAY

             “Oh, thank God! Where were you?” Grace asked as soon as she saw
Ashley. Grace and Tom were standing in front of Kirstin’s hospital room.
             “At the chapel.”
When Ashley said that phrase, Grace started to cry. If Ashley was at the
chapel, it was because the situation was serious.
“Oh, my God. Why? What happened? Did anyone say anything?” Tom just rubbed
his forehead and shook his head.
“I don’t know! That’s the worst thing! I have no idea what is going on and
why she was taken into surgery!” Ashley knocked the wall.
“Ashley, just stay calm, man.” Tom was actually trying to help Ashley “We
have to get some information. They just can’t leave us here not knowing
what’s going on.” Tom left, trying to get some information.
Grace wasn’t saying a word. She just sat in a chair in front of the room.
Ashley sat beside her.
“It’s serious, isn’t it, Ash?” Grace turned to face him.
“I don’t know…” Ashley just shook his head.
“Then why were you at the chapel?”
“I just had to do something. Maybe that way, I don’t know… God will send us
some sign of what’s going on in there. You know?”
“Yeah…” Grace nodded “But… do you think like… this is serious?”
“I…” Ashley was afraid of his own thoughts “I’m afraid it is, G. Otherwise,
why would they be operating on her?”
“Oh, God. And the baby?” Grace’s eyes were completely red.
“I don’t know. I just… I just pray they are both alive. That’s all I want.”
They stayed in silence for a while, both with their heads down.

After a few minutes, Ashley looked up and saw Tom trailing their way. He
immediately stood up.
“So… anything, man?” Ashley asked, but he was hopeless.
“No…” Tom just looked down and shook his head “What the fuck is going on,
man?” Tom kicked the wall.
“I don’t know!” Ashley shouted.
“Now, you two, just calm down, alright? Please! You’re making me more
nervous, if that’s even possible.” Grace said to the two of them.
“Sorry… but why won’t they tell us anything?” Tom was frustrated.
“I don’t know. But that can’t continue for too long. Soon, we’ll hear
something. Just… I know it’s difficult right now, but just… be patient,
alright?” Grace asked the guys.
Ashley and Tom just looked at Grace, turned their heads and started pacing
around. Grace was still seated, now holding her head with both her hands.

“That’s the doctor, right?” Tom pointed so Grace and Ashley would see the
man a few feet away from them.
“Yes! That’s him!” Ashley affirmed.
“Should we go talk to him?” Tom asked, seeing that the doctor was not
looking at them.
“No, he’s coming to us. I’m pretty sure he’s coming to us.” Grace tried to
stay calm.
“Ok.” Ashley said.

“Hi.” after a couple of minutes, the doctor addressed to the three of them
standing right in front of him.
“Doctor, what happened? She was fine when the nurses took her to do the
tests and…” Ashley started, but got cut off by the doctor.
“What happened was…” the doctor went through her medical files “We were
doing the ultrasound and everything seemed fine. So I just asked her to put
her clothes back on. When she got up to get dressed, she started to bleed
again. We immediately sedated her, because she was getting really nervous
right there, and we didn’t need that kind of stress to the baby. So we
sedated her and took her to the O.R.”
“Why was she bleeding again?” Tom was in agony.
“Well… we took her to surgery and just in surgery we were able to see that
pretty close to the uterus, there was a vein that had a coagulum that wasn’t
letting the ideal amount of blood get to the baby. So when we saw that vein,
it had been torn apart, causing this particular external bleeding.”
“But… that wasn’t why she bled the other time.” Grace frowned “Was it?”
“No. Her uterus’ wall was too thick, and still is. But that wasn’t what
caused this bleeding.” the doctor informed.
“And why didn’t you see this vein before? That coagulum was there for a
while, wasn’t it?” Ashley asked.
“Not that long, but due to the location of this vein, we weren’t able to see
it in an ultrasound.” the doctor looked at the charts again.
“But… doctor… What does… that mean?” Ashley was afraid to hear the answer.
“Well…” the doctor closed the files and looked at the three of them “Kirstin
is fine. She is sleeping now and will be coming back to her room in an hour
or so.”
“And the baby, doctor?” Tom asked, shaking.
“When we took her inside the O.R. and we cut her open, the baby was already
dead. There was nothing we could do.”
“NO!” Ashley and Tom screamed in unison.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Helloooooooooooo y'all!

     So... this note is especially for those readers that never review.
     I'm finishing writing this whole hospital scenes. So I REALLY need you
guys opinion, alright? I REALLY have to know if you guys are enjoying this
fic so far and if there's people actually reading it. I need those answers,
your thoughts on the fic so far, general stuff, because depending on the
answers, I'll decide how long this fic will go. I still have a LOT, I mean,
a LOT of ideas to write. Too much actually. As it is my last fic I really
have a lot I wanna add to this fic. So I need to know if I'll have you guys
out there to read it. Because this fic can go long, like... 50+ chapters,
because I'm already at chapter 28 and I still have too much I wanna add to
it, so... Let me know if you guys like this fic so far and if you'd keep
reading if it goes to 50+ chapters, alright? If I dont get too much replies,
I'll just cut the fic short. That's fine too. I think I can rap things up...

     Now... reviews!!! yourfanfic@... or http://myfanfictionsite.cjb
net
     Love
     Fernanda

------------------------------

~*~ Chapter 28 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOSPITAL – MAR. 16TH, 2002 – SATURDAY

             Ashley immediately looked up at Tom.
             “Can’t we all stay?” Ashley asked the nurse.
             “I’m afraid not, sir. It’s hospital policy.” the nurse said
kindly.
             “But… he came from Los Angeles to be with Kirstin.” Grace tried
to help Ashley out. Tom just observed.
             “I’m sorry, miss. There’s really nothing I can do about that.”
Claire said and then closed the door behind her.
             Ashley just looked at Tom with despair and returned his gaze to
Kirstin. He still held her hand tight to his.
             “I’m sorry, Ash.” Grace said about neither him nor her being
able to stay there. Ashley didn’t say a thing. Neither did Tom. The three of
them just kept looking at Kirstin, sometimes switching their gaze to the
heart monitor.

             After what seemed to be 20 minutes, the nurse Claire came back
into the room.
             “I’m sorry, but the visiting hour is over.” she announced with
sorrow on her eyes “I’ll give you some time to say goodbye.” she said and
closed the door.
             Grace got closer to Kirstin and let a tear fall. She hadn’t
cried the time she spent inside Kirstin’s room, but saying goodbye to
Kirstin in the state her friend was in, hurt Grace. She wanted to be by her
side, but she couldn’t. She got closer and kissed Kirstin on the cheek
without saying a word.
             Then it was Ashley’s time to say goodbye.
             “K, my sweet baby, I have to go now. I know you’re listening.
Don’t worry. I’ll be right outside waiting until it’s time for visits again,
ok? I’ll be right there, just a door away. If you need me, yell and I’ll
come, alright? I won’t leave you. Don’t worry.” a tear fell down his face.
At that moment, Tom exited the room “Ok, I’m going now.” he got up from the
chair beside her hospital bed, brushed a lock of hair away from her face and
kissed her tenderly on the lips “I love you.” he brought his lips close to
her ear “Wake up soon, please!” another tear fell. Before he pulled back, he
kissed her again, this time on her forehead.
             When he was standing up, he wiped the tears away from his face.
He stood up staring at Kirstin for a couple of minutes. Then he headed to
the door with Grace when Tom came inside again.
             “Listen, I…” Tom started, but got cut off by Ashley.
             “I really don’t wanna hear you throw in my face that you get to
stay with her, ok? I already feel bad as it is and…”
             “Could you just listen, man? Jeez…” Tom just shook his head “I
talked to the doctor and convinced him to let you stay with Kirstin instead
of me.”
             “No, you didn’t!” Grace exclaimed immediately.
             “Yes… I did. I know it’s the best for her and if it’s the best
for her, it’s the best for the baby, and that’s what I’m worried about now.
So, you stay, man. I know she needs you much more than she needs me.”
             “I can’t believe it.” Ashley said incredulous.
             “I know. Me neither. So I better get out of here before I regret
it.” Tom said with a grin.
             “Thanks, man. Really.” Ashley thanked Tom. Tom showed his hand
out to Ashley, but instead of taking it, Ashley gave him a hug “You really
don’t know how much this means to me. Thank you so much, man.”
             “Yeah…” Tom patted Ashley’s back “I know. And I know how much it
means to Kirstin too. That’s why I did it.”
             “Good.” Ashley said, pulling back.
             “Ok, then we should go, Tom.” Grace informed.
             “Yeah. Let me just say goodbye to Kirstin first.”
             “Oh, yeah, sure.” Ashley clear the way so Tom could get to
Kirstin’s bed.
             “KeeKee, bye.” he kissed Kirstin on the cheek “I’ll be coming
back tomorrow. Ashley’s staying, so… I know you’ll be fine. Bye.” he kissed
her again and left the room with Grace by his said.
             Ashley looked at them leaving through the glass window before he
retreated to the chair beside the hospital bed.
             “Wow. Did you hear that, K? Man… Tom is… changed. I might start
liking waiter boy now. Wow… I don’t know if I would have done the same thing
in his position. Wow. You gotta appreciate the guy.” he grinned at Kirstin.

             Ashley kept in silence until the nurse came back, half an hour
later.
             “Oh, you’re here? What happened to the tall dark-headed guy?
Wasn’t he the father of the baby?” she said looking at Kirstin’s medication.
             “Yeah, well… he is the father, but he talked to the doctor and
asked me to stay instead of him.”
             “Wow… if you don’t mind me asking… what is your connection to
Miss Addams?” the nurse said trading Kirstin’s medication.
             “I’m her boyfriend.”
             “Oh. So… you’re her boyfriend and not the father of her baby?”
Ashley nodded “What a complicated relationship you got there!”
             “Yeah, you could say that.” Ashley pulled a lock of hair away
from Kirstin’s face again “Why won’t she wake up? She doesn’t usually sleep
like a rock like this. She usually wakes up if she hears a door being opened
”
             “Well, the medication she was on was really strong. She needed
the sleep and she was really depressed when she came here. So we gave her
some sedatives to help her sleep and feel better when she wakes up. But I
just changed that. Now she’s on a lighter medication, so she’ll probably
wake up in an hour or so.”
             “Oh, good.” Ashley looked at her tenderly and kissed her hand.
             “Miss Addams is really lucky.” Claire watched Ashley.
             “Why is that?” Ashley looked up at the nurse.
             “She’s been through a lot today, survived it all and got you by
her side. You clearly love her.”
             “I do…” Ashley stared at Kirstin “Very much.”
             “Good. That’s good. Most of our patients don’t have anyone to
stay with then. It’s always good to see what I’m seeing in this room.”
Ashley smiled up at her “Well, let me go now. If you need anything, just
press that red button above her bed, alright?”
             “Yeah. Thanks.”
             “No problem, sir. Bye.”
             “Bye.”
Claire closed the door behind her and left Ashley alone with Kirstin again.

             It had been about 40 minutes and Kirstin was still asleep.
Ashley closed his eyes for a bit. He was so tired from the traveling and
from all the stress he’d been through since he got to New York that he could
easily sleep right there in that chair. And that’s what he did. He fell
asleep.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hey hey hey!!!


     See? See? See? What have I been telling you guys since... I dont know...
Forever? That Tom is nice, he really loves Kirstin, he's sweet, he's not bad
  he's not bad... But did you listen? Noooooooo! Just because he did one
mistake, you go and throw rocks at him! Poor guy! But see? Know everybody
seems to like him! I hate to do this, but... TOLD YA SO! LoL
     So... I got great reviews for chapter 28. Thanx so much everyone! Glad
people are really enjoying it and asking me to make it as long as I want to.
Thanx! That really made my day!!!
     Anyways... here's chapter 29... Wonder if Kirstin wakes up? You'll see..

     Dont forget to review! My email addy is yourfanfic@... or sign
the guestbook http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

---------------------------

~*~ Chapter 29 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOSPITAL – MAR. 16TH, 2002 – SATURDAY

             Ashley frowned. He still had his eyes closed. He was sleeping.
Wasn’t he? He felt someone putting pressure on his hands. Was that a dream?
He slowly opened his eyes.
             “You’re awake!” Ashley sat up.
             “Hey…” Kirstin didn’t sound too happy.
             “Hey, baby.” Ashley got closer to her and pecked her lips “How
are you? Are you feeling ok?”
             “No.” Kirstin answered and started to cry.
             “Sh… don’t cry, honey. Everything is fine!”
             “Ash… the… baby… the baby. Is it…” Kirstin squeezed Ashley’s
hand.
             “The baby is great, baby.” a small smiled appeared on Kirstin’s
face “See that monitor right there?” Ashley pointed to the monitor and
Kirstin turned to look t it “The first line shows your heart beat. The one
below it shows the baby’s heart beat.”
             “Really?” Kirstin couldn’t stop staring at the monitor “Is that
really our baby’s heart?” Kirstin had said ‘our baby’. Ashley couldn’t help
but smile.
             “Yes, sweetie. That’s our big boy’s heart.” Kirstin abruptly
turned to face Ashley.
             “It’s… a… boy?” she stuttered.
             “Yeah…” Ashley caressed her face “It’s a baby boy.” Kirstin
smiled and tears fell from both her eyes.
             “I can’t believe it…” Kirstin held Ashley’s hand even tighter.
             “I know. I know you’ve always wanted a boy first.” Ashley smiled
into her eyes.
             “You… How do… how do you know?” Kirstin frowned.
             “You told me once when we were in high school. You told me that
when you had your family, you wanted a boy first so when you had a girl,
she’d always have a big brother to look after her, take care of her.”
             “I…” Kirstin was speechless. She said that once to Ashley. She
didn’t even remember telling him that. But he held on to that memory “Wow,
Ash. I can’t believe you remember stuff like that.”
             “I already told you once that everything you do or say, I always
pay double attention.”
             “Yeah, but… well… I thought that was just… I don’t know… a pick
up line or something.” Ashley chuckled. ‘God, how can she make me chuckled
even in a situation like this?’
             “Well, it probably was.” now it was Kirstin that was giggling
“But it didn’t mean it wasn’t true.”
             “Thank you.” Kirstin said after an awkward silence.
             “For what, baby?” Ashley asked her.
             “For everything. For sticking by me. For never giving up on me.
I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Kirstin felt a tear fall.
             “Baby…” Ashley wiped the tear away “You don’t have to thank me.
I did it all gladly.” Ashley pecked her on the lips again.
             “I love you.” Kirstin caressed his cheek.
             “I love you, too.”
             “Ash?”
             “Yeah?”
             “What… I mean… Why was I… bleeding? Did the doctor tell?”
             “Yes. He told it was because of your medicine. The salt in your
medicine that caused that. It weakened the walls of your uterus and it
caused it to bleed.”
             “What medicine? Lexol?” Kirstin frowned. Ashley nodded “I can’t
believe it’s my own fault. I can’t believe I put my baby in danger.”
             “K, it’s not your fault. You didn’t know.”
             “Well, that’s my fault for being so ignorant.”
             “How would you know that the medicine would cause that? K, it’s
not your fault!”
             “Then it’s that stupid doctor’s we went to see fault! He knew I
was taking Lexol and he knew I was pregnant and he didn’t tell me anything!”
that remark made Ashley think. Kirstin was right.
             “Yeah…” Ashley frowned “He did. Why didn’t he tell us then?”
Ashley’s frown was still on “Maybe he is not the best doctor as I was told.
Then maybe it’s my fault. I brought you to that doctor. I forced you to go
to that doctor. If we’ve gone to someone else, maybe that other one would
have told us something.”
             “Ash, I don’t think it’s your fault. I think it’s totally mine
or the doctor’s.”
             “K, you know what? Just forget it. It was no one’s fault. If we
keep thinking about it, we’re gonna go insane. Just forget. It had to happen
”
             “Yeah… maybe it happened so… you and Tom could be friends.”
             “What?”
             “I heard you talking when he left.” Kirstin grinned.
             “You did?”
             “Yeah… I was too sedated. I couldn’t speak nor open my eyes, but
I was listening. He did a pretty nice thing, didn’t he?”
             “Yeah… he was pretty cool. Don’t know what made him change so
much.” Ashley sounded confused.
             “Maybe the baby.”
             “Probably the baby, yeah.” Ashley nodded his head.
             “Good. Then I won’t have to listen to you two fighting anymore.”
             “Hope not. Hope he doesn’t change when this is all gone.”
             “Yeah… And how’s Grace? Poor girl, she helped me so much. I
don’t know what would have happened if she wasn’t with me in my apartment.”
             “Oh, don’t even go that way. Gladly, she was. She was like… an
angel.”
             “She sure was. I can’t thank her enough.”
             “She suffered, K. She was crying so much all the time.”
             “Well, I can imagine. I’d do the same if something like this
would happen to her.”
             “Yeah…” Ashley agreed.
             “Hello.” the doctor said as he got inside the room “Oh, I see
you’re already awake, Miss Addams.”
             “Yes.” she smiled to the nice doctor.
             “Good. That’s good.” he checked the monitor and took some notes
on Kirstin’s file “So… your baby seems to be doing fine.”
             “Oh, thank God.” Kirstin said relieved.
             “But I wanted to talk to you about something.” the doctor
informed and Kirstin and Ashley both felt tense. Kirstin grabbed Ashley’s
hand even tighter, if that was possible.
             “Yes.” Ashley said in a tense tone of voice.
             “I checked the ultrasound pictures and your uterus’ wall is
indeed weak and we won’t be able to do anything about that for now. If you
stop taking that medicine, only then, your wall will get thick again. But
that will take some time. There’s still a lot of salt in your blood and will
take a while for your system to get rid of it. And until then, I’m afraid
there’s still the risk of the bleeding to come back. If the baby does any
sudden moves, he will damage the wall and it might cause another bleeding.”
             “So… what are you saying is that there’s nothing we can do to
prevent the bleeding?” Ashley asked, worried.
             “I’m afraid not. The only think is to keep the baby calm, so he
won’t get agitated and start moving around too much. And for that to happen,
Kirstin, you can’t go under any stress or anything that will cause a rush of
emotions on your system, because the baby would feel that too.”
             “Ok, ok.” Ashley nodded “And how long will it take for her body
to get rid of the salt?”
             “Probably a month, even two. Depends on how well her system
works.”
             “Ok. I think we can do that, right, honey?” Ashley looked at
Kirstin, who was clearly afraid. She just nodded, but didn’t seem too sure
about that.
             “Good.” the doctor wrote something on her file again.
             “And doctor?” Ashley asked.
             “Yes.” the doctor answered.
             “How long will you keep her here?” Ashley asked again.
             “Well, her heart and the baby’s heart seem to be doing fine. But
  Miss Addams, you did lose a lot of blood. So we’re gonna have to keep you
here at least until tomorrow night. Tomorrow morning we’ll run a few more
tests and depending on the results, you’ll be free to go. I’m pretty
confident you’ll be fine by tomorrow night.” Ashley and Kirstin both smiled
up to the doctor “Well, I have to go. If you need anything, call a nurse. If
nothing happens, I’ll only be back tomorrow, alright?”
             “Ok. Thank you, doctor.” Ashley thanked him.
             “No problem.” the doctor smiled and shut the door behind him.





[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Ok then... here's chapter 30. Going fast these days, huh? I'm just doing
that because I've been getting such GREAT reviews! Thanx so much you guys!
Can't thank you enough! You rock!
     So... on with chapter 30. I dont think there's anything major here, but
I hope you like it anyways... Some drama is about to come soon, so... be
prepared! hehehehe
     I GTG, REVIEW!! yourfanfic@... or http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

------------------

~*~ Chapter 30 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOSPITAL – MAR. 17TH, 2002 – SUNDAY

             Ashley was sleeping in the chair and Kirstin was also sound
asleep the next morning when Grace and Tom got to their room. None of them
wanted to wake them up, so they just went back to the waiting room.
             “Oh… I forgot to call Kirstin’s sister! I’ll be right back!”
Grace got up and headed to a corner nearby, picking up Kirstin’s cell phone
from her own purse. She had kept Kirstin’s cell phone so she could have the
numbers of all people she needed to call to tell about Kirstin’s situation.

             “So…?” Tom asked when she got back.
             “She said she’s sorry but she can’t come. She has a big test
tomorrow and can’t miss that. But asked me to say to Kirstin that she loves
her and will be praying for her.”
             “Good. That’s good.” Tom nodded. Do you wanna go see if they
woke up yet?” he asked Grace.
             “Yeah, sure. Let’s go.”

             When they got to the room, they looked through the window and
saw Kirsten alone on the bed. They frowned and entered the room.
             “K, are you awake?” Grace asked as soon as Tom closed the door
behind them.
             “G!” Kirstin tried to sat up, but couldn’t. She was still
hurting.
             “Don’t! You’re crazy! Don’t do any kind of movement like that!”
Tom warned her. She just grinned at him.
             “Oh, baby! I’m so happy you’re fine.” Grace hugged her friend.
             “Grace, I have to thank you. You were what saved me yesterday.”
             “Oh, don’t say that. I did what I had to do. I know you would
have done the same to me, so…”
             “I really would.” Kirstin smiled to her friend.
             “I know. Because that’s what friends are for.” Grace smiled back
and gave way for Tom to get near the bed.
             “Hey, KeeKee.” Tom hugged her too.
             “Hey, Tommy.” they pulled back from the hug and Kirstin smiled
into his eyes “Tom, thank you so much for last night. For letting Ashley
stay.”
             “Hey, don’t worry. I only want what’s best for you. You know
that.”
             “Yeah, I do. But still, thank you. You didn’t have to do that,
but you did.”
             “You’re wrong. I had to do that because that was the right thing
to do.” Tom half-smiled at Kirstin and she just pulled him to her and kissed
him on the cheek.
             “Thank you.” she said in his ear. When Tom pulled back, he just
smiled big to her.
             “Where’s Ash?” Grace wondered.
             “He went to get some coffee for him.”
             “Oh, ok.” Grace said and at that moment, Ashley came in.
             “Oh, hey guys!” Ashley greeted. He kissed Grace on the cheek and
shook Tom’s hand. Then he sat back on the chair and took a sip of his coffee

             “Kirstin, I called Andy, your parents and your sister to tell
them.” Grace informed.
             “Oh, you did? And how did they take it?” Kirstin asked worried.
             “Well, Andy says he’ll try to stop by later to visit you.”
Kirstin smiled at that. Her boss was just too good “Your sister said she’s
sorry she won’t be able to come. She has a big test tomorrow, but she said
she loves you and she’s praying for you.”
             “Yeah, I called my parents too to tell them and my mom also told
me you’ll be on her prayers.” Ashley told Kirstin who just smiled.
             “What about mom and dad?” Kirstin inquired.
             “They asked how you were now. I said you were doing fine. Your
mom wanted to come here today, but your father and I talked her into staying
there. There’s not really much she can do here and you’re already fine, so..
  I didn’t know if you wanted your parents around.”
             “No, it’s fine. It’s better that they stay there. I’m feeling
fine and there’s no need to spend all the money coming here.”
             “That’s what I told her. But she said she’s gonna call you later
to talk to you. I kept your phone to call them, but here it is.” Grace
handed her friend her phone back.
             “Ok. Thanks.” Kirstin grinned.
             “So, is everything fine? Did the doctor say anything about your
condition?” Tom asked, changing the subject.
             “Well, he said the situation is still delicate.” Ashley started
“The wall is still weak and it’ll stay like that for a month or so. So
Kirstin needs to rest and try not to go through any emotional situations or
it will upset the baby and cause him to rip the wall again.”
             “I can’t believe there’s still a risk!” Tom shook his head.
             “Yeah, I couldn’t either. And there’s nothing we can do.” Ashley
also shook his head. Kirstin watched that scene and somehow thought it was
ironic. She just shook her head and grinned a bit.
             “What?” Ashley asked, noticing that.
             “Nothing.” Kirstin just decided to let that go “What time is
it?” Kirstin asked.
             “It’s 11:45.” Grace answered.
             “I’m hungry.” Kirstin said.
             “I’ll get the nurse.” Ashley said, pressing the button above
Kirstin’s bed.
             “And we have to go. We only have 15 minutes with you on Sundays
”
             “That sucks!” Kirstin exclaimed.
             “I know! Tell that to the hospital!” Grace exclaimed too.
             “I will!” Kirstin exclaimed again and they giggled at the voices
they were making.
             “K… please, if you need anything, ask Ashley to call me and I’ll
bring you anything, alright?” Grace hugged her friend.
             “Yeah, sure. Thanks, G.”
             “Don’t mention.” she said, pulling back from the hug.
             “Keekee, the same goes with me. If you need anything, call me.
And we’ll come visit you tomorrow again.”
             “Oh, I might be going home tonight.” Kirstin informed Tom and
Grace.
             “Really? Already? Do they think it’s safe?” Tom frowned.
             “Well, the doctor said they are gonna run some tests, but
probably, yeah, she’s fine to go.” Ashley answered Tom’s question.
             “Wow… that was… fast.” Tom frowned. He still wasn’t convinced
that Kirstin was fine to go. She still looked too pale and weak “Hope they
know what they are doing.”
             “Me too.” Kirstin smiled to him.
             “Well, then we’ll see you tomorrow at your place then.” Grace
told her friend.
             “Ok. See ya.” Kirstin smiled and waved them goodbye.

             “Did someone call me?” Claire, the nurse, walked into the room.
             “Yes.” Ashley answered.
             “Oh, you’re awake! Hi, dear. I’m Claire. You probably don’t
remember me, but I was with the doctor yesterday while he was doing your
ultrasound.”
             “Sorry, don’t remember.” Kirstin shook her head.
             “Well, I figured. You weren’t really good. You passed out three
times.”
             “I did?” Kirstin sounded surprised. Ashley looked worried.
             “You don’t remember that?” Kirstin shook her head “Well, it
wasn’t anything serious. It was just because of all the blood you lost. But
what matters is that you’re fine now.” the nurse smiled to Kirstin. Kirstin
smiled back “So, why did you call me?” she looked at Ashley.
             “She’s hungry. Can you, I don’t know… bring her lunch? Is that
how it works here? I don’t know…”
             “Yeah, I’ll bring her lunch.” she smiled to Ashley “And I have
to switch that medication too. I’ll be back with your food and your
medication.” she turned back and headed to the door. When she opened it, she
turned back to Kirstin again “Oh, I forgot!” she knelt down and picked
something up off the floor “Someone left this for you. You had visit, I
didn’t want to interrupt that, so I just left it here.” Claire said entering
the room with flowers in her hand.
             “Wow, they are beautiful!” Kirstin exclaimed and took the orange
orchid vase from Claire.
             “They sure are.” Claire smiled “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll
go get your lunch. Be right back.”
             “Thanks.” Ashley said before she closed the door “Who are they
from?” Ashley asked Kirstin.
             “Don’t know. Let me see here.” Kirstin grabbed the little
envelope “Kirstin, I’m sorry I won’t be able to stop by. Work. But I’ll call
you. Get well soon! I need you here! Best Wishes… Andrew Jackson.” Kirstin
finished reading it out loud and put the note inside the envelope again
“Andy is so nice.”
             “Yes, he is. I wish I had a boss like that. Mike never gave me
flowers!” Kirstin giggled.
             “Silly. Come here.” she asked him and kissed him gently on the
lips.
Ashley took the vase from Kirstin’s hand and placed it on a table beside the
bed.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hi! Im great how is everyone else?
Thea

cls7jlb <no_reply@yahoogroups.com> wrote:
i just wanted to say hi to everyone. Hope everyone is doing good.




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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hello everybody!

     Ok... so I got a good amount of review for chapter 13! Thanx so much
everybody. Some people got really surprised at how things turned out. Good.
That's what I wanted... :)
     So... here's chapter 14. It's kinda short, but I like it... really
emotional and stuff. LoL
     I might have to go on hiatus here. I'm travelling on Monday, going to
Rio de Janeiro! Yay! And I'm staying a whole week, so don't know when I'll
have the next chapter out. So it's really important that you guys review
this time, so when I come back and see all the reviews, I'll get happy and
excited to write chapter 15. So... REVIEW! Email addy: yourfanfic@...
or guestbook at http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

-------------

~*~ Chapter 14 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – FEB. 14TH, 2001 – Tuesday

             “What?” Ashley shouted incredulous.
             “Ash, calm down, please. We can…”
             “No, we can’t!” Ashley cut her off without even hearing what she
had to say “We can’t anything. The baby is Tom’s?” Ashley shouted again.
Kirstin just looked down “Tom’s? That… son of a bitch! He got you pregnant!
I can’t believe it! And now… he’s gone! Out of the picture! And I’m left
with his baby?” Ashley just shook his head.
             “No, Ashley. I’m left with his baby!” Kirstin got mad at him
“You don’t have to worry about it. I can see you’re pretty angry at Tom
right now, but it wasn’t just his fault, you know? It takes two to do that.
It’s my fault too. And if you can’t handle that, as you clearly can’t, then
just don’t. You don’t have to. It’s not your responsibility. So, just get
out of here.”
             “But, Kirstin, please, put yourself in my shoes, if that’s
possible. What do you think I’m supposed to think? I hate that guy and now
I’m gonna have to live with his child? And you weren’t suppose to be that
cool about that either! He cheated on you! You shouldn’t be so happy about
carrying his baby.” Ashley said and Kirstin got even madder.
             “Listen…” Kirstin said getting really close to Ashley “It’s not
his baby. It’s my baby, too. I really don’t like Tom right now, but this
child has nothing to do with what he’s done. So why should I be mad at this
pregnancy? Why should I put all the anger I feel for Tom over this baby? It
doesn’t deserve it! It’s not its fault things ended up the way it did!”
             “K, I’m sorry, but…” Ashley started but got cut off by Kirstin.
             “No, you’re not sorry! You can’t even face me right now, can
you?” Kirstin noticed the look in Ashley’s face “You don’t like me right now
because of this child.”
             “You know what? It’s true. I can’t really talk to you right now.
This is just too much for me. If it was mine, I’d totally be here for you,
but now I really don’t know what to do. I’m totally confused. I don’t know
what the right thing to do is. I don’t even think there are right things to
do. I think there are just things to be done. And I don’t know if I’m
prepared for them.”
             “That’s fine.” Kirstin knew it would be too much to ask Ashley
to help her with Tom’s child. She had already thought about that before
Ashley got there “I guess you are right and I guess I should give you some
time to think about it.”
             “Thanks. I’m glad you respect that and understand my side.”
Ashley didn’t really know what to say. He was still off. Too much stuff
going on in his mind “If you excuse me, I’d like to go now.”
             “Sure.” Kirstin looked down, sad, and followed him to the door.
Ashley looked at her while hitting the elevator button “Ashley, I can do
this alone. I know I can raise this baby alone. But I really wanted you by
my side. So I just want you to consider one thing. It doesn’t matter if it’s
yours or Tom’s baby. Either way, it is mine. And either way, I’d like to
raise it with you.” Ashley looked at her. They were both serious. It was a
tough situation. He looked at her and then entered the elevator. What would
he do now?


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hey...

     Would like to thank the people who are still reviewing my fic! Thanx so
much, guys! For you, I decided to update so quickly! :)
     Also... Taryn and Stacie for correcting the grammar. Every now and then
I have to do this, right? :)
     So... reviews! yourfanfic@... or http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

---------------

~*~ Chapter 24 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – FEB. 16TH, 2002 – SATURDAY

             Kirstin got up around 7:30 am. She got dressed, drank a glass of
milk and ran out of the door.
             “Man… I’m gonna fail this year. I never go to my classes anymore
  It’s Saturday and I think I haven’t been there once this week.” she said
getting into her car and going somewhere far from NYU.


    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOTEL

             Ashley also got up early. It was 8:05 am when he opened his eyes
and stared at the clock on the nightstand. He stretched and got up, heading
to the bathroom.
             He changed into some decent clothes, which consisted of a black
t-shirt and a pair of light blue jeans, and headed to the elevator.
             When he was heading to the exit, he stopped. He saw a familiar
figure at the check-in counter. He headed that way.
             “Kirstin?” Ashley asked from behind her.
             “Oh, you scared me!” Kirstin placed her hand on her chest “Hi.”
she half-smiled.
             “Hey.” Ashley had a frown on.
             “I’m sorry to get here so early. You’re not… leaving, are you?”
             “Actually… I was just leaving to go to your apartment.” Ashley
shoved his hands down his pockets.
             “Oh…” Kirstin looked down “Can we… I don’t know, go somewhere to
talk?”
             “Yeah, sure. Let’s go up to my room.” Ashley and Kirstin headed
to the elevator.

             Nothing was said between the couple until they were both inside
Ashley’s room. And it was Kirstin that started it.
             “Listen, Ashley, I just wanted to explain to you what really
happened yesterday at the restaurant. I…”
             “Kirstin, I also wanted to explain why I exploded like that in
the car. It wasn’t your…”
             “Ok. We both have something to say. So… who’s gonna start?”
Kirstin grinned at him.
             “I… I guess you can start, that’s fine.” Ashley said and
motioned for Kirstin to sit on a chair. He sat on another one right in front
of hers.
             “So… As I was saying… I think you got the wrong idea yesterday.
I never meant to get back with Tom or anything. Ever. He’s completely out of
my love life. But he can’t be out of my baby’s life. This may be hard for
you to understand, but he is the father and I want him to be around. It will
do so much good for the baby. And you don’t have to worry about him being
around. Nothing will happen. That I can promise you. I can’t accept Tom back
  Not after what he did and not now when everything is so great… well, not so
much right now… but when everything is great between us. I can’t.” Kirstin
looked down and played with her fingers “I don’t wanna loose you again.”
Ashley grabbed her hands, causing her to stop playing with her fingers.
             “Kirstin, you don’t have to worry. You’re not loosing me,
because I don’t wanna loose you either. I know I over reacted last night.
Too much. But, when you left to go to the restroom, Tom said some stuff to
me that kinda… got to me, you know? Made me think and I didn’t like where my
thoughts were leading me.”
             “What? He told you stuff? What did he say?” Kirstin frowned. She
didn’t know Tom had said disturbing things to Ashley while she was in the
restroom.
             “Oh, stuff like… this baby will never see me as a father if he
was around. That I’ll always be mommy’s boyfriend to the baby.” Ashley
looked down “And it got to me. I really don’t want that to happen. I’m
pretty sure I’m gonna love this baby and I want him to see me as a parent.
And then there was that flirtation going on. Of course, he was just trying
to tease me, I know, with the ultrasound talk, but it also got to me. I am
jealous, Kirstin, and you know it. So I couldn’t take that anymore. And I
decided to take this out on you. And it wasn’t your fault. And I’m so sorry.
I really am. I just want you to understand where I was coming from.” Ashley
looked deeply into her eyes. Kirstin wasn’t crying. She didn’t feel like it
at that moment. Maybe it was because she had cried too much the day before.
             “Ash, I had no idea Tom had said all that stupid stuff to you.
And you don’t have to worry about it. Of course the baby will love you! Come
on! Its heart won’t be made of stone! You’ll always be there, helping me
raise it, being around, loving this baby. Do you really think that if you
love it, it won’t love you back? Come on! That is not the kind of education
he’ll get from us!” Kirstin joked and grinned “Don’t worry, baby. This baby
will love you! Probably even more then Tom.”
             “Yeah… if we can teach it anything, that’ll be it! For it to
love me more then Tom.” Ashley chuckled and Kirstin giggled.
             “See? Don’t worry. Everything will be fine! We’ll work it out.”
             “Yeah…” Ashley said and smiled tenderly at her.
             “Our love is just too strong. We’ll go through everything
together. But we gotta stay together for that to happen.”
             “I know. And that’s what I intend to do. I won’t let you go.
Never. Love you too much.”
             “Love you too, Ash.” Kirstin kissed him lightly on the lips. Things
would be good. Again.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hello...

     So, ok... not so many reviews as I thought I'd get... maybe people are
just getting tired of the fic.  Then won't push it. So I'm sending chapter
22 sooner then expected for the sake of those people who are still reading
it. Thanx a lot! And thank you even more if you're reviewing!
     This chapter has a little swearing at the end of it, so... PG-13 I guess
.. and also... DO NOT GET MAD AT ME. I already see people getting mad at me
because of this chapter (OK JEN? LoL), everything will be fine. Trust me. :)
Well, at least I hope so... LoL
     Feedback. PLEASE!!! Keep them coming! yourfanfic@... or
http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

------------------------

~*~ Chapter 22 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – RESTAURANT – FEB. 15TH, 2001 – Wednesday

             Kirstin got to where they were sitting and stood in front of
them. As soon as they saw Kirstin standing there, they abruptly stood up.
             “K, baby…” Ashley started, heading closer to Kirstin. Kirstin
stopped him.
             “Ash, just… let me do the talking now, alright?” Kirstin said
kindly, but Tom decided to take it as offensive and just shot Ashley a
winning smile “Ok.” Kirstin took a deep breath “I’ve done some thinking
while in the restroom. And Tom…” Kirstin turned to Tom “You’re right. You
have the right to raise this child just as I have.”
             “But…” Ashley interrupted again and got cut off by Kirstin.
             “We are both the parents. We both… well… did make this child and
we are equally responsible for it. So, ok. We’re gonna raise it together.”
Tom looked at Ashley, who didn’t have such a happy face on, and smiled
triumphly “However…” Kirstin continued “Ashley is my partner now. So he will
also be around. Whenever the baby is with me, Ashley will also be there and
he’s gonna be kind of a parent, a relative… Well, something, to this baby.
Because he is gonna help me raise it.”
             “But, Keekee…” now it was Tom that decided to interrupt Kirstin
and she, too, cut him off.
             “Ashley and I have discussed that already and he is willing to
help me with the baby. So, he’s fine with that. And that’s how it is gonna
be.” Kirstin smiled tenderly at Ashley who smiled back.
             “Kirstin, this is gonna be really hard for the baby.” Tom told
her.
             “No, it won’t. It will be used to it. It’s gonna be like that
from the day of its birth, so… nothing will be unusual for it.”
             “But…” Tom searched for another reason this wouldn’t work, but
couldn’t find one. He looked down and continued “How is this gonna work?”
             “What do you mean?” Kirstin frowned.
             “Like… when do I get the baby and stuff like that.”
             “Tom, you can visit it whenever you want it. It’s your baby too.
It’s gonna live with me, but whenever you feel like spending time alone with
it, you just call me and we’ll arrange for you to come pick it up. We’re not
going through a painful divorce or anything. Things won’t be complicated.”
Kirstin grinned at Tom “Don’t worry. I want this baby to be around his
father too. It’s not only you who wants that.”
             “Thank you.” Tom said in a gentle tone of voice.
             “What are you thanking me for?” Kirstin frowned.
             “For letting me be part of it.” Tom looked down “Despite what
I’ve done to you.” Ashley looked at him and nodded ‘You got that right,
pal!’ he thought.
             “Tom… I really don’t like you for doing what you did to me, but
you’ve done nothing to this baby. So, I don’t see why you can’t be a part of
this baby’s life.”
             “You’re just so… motherly already.” Tom took her hands in his
again “I see we’ll have no problems raising this child.”
             “Yeah…” Kirstin shook a thought out of her mind as she took her
hand out of Tom’s “Well, I’ve always wanted that… To be a mother.”
             “Yes, I know. We’ve talked about that before.” Tom looked into
her eyes. Ashley wasn’t enjoying that.
             “So, ok. Everything’s settled then.” Ashley interrupted. He
couldn’t handle it anymore. He had a jealousy level that he was capable to
handle and he had just reached that level.
             “Yeah…” Kirstin got closer to Ashley and took his hand in hers.
             “Do you know if it’s a boy or if it’s a girl already?” Tom asked
excited.
             “No… I just knew yesterday that I was pregnant and it was by
accident, so…”
             “And do you wanna know?” Tom asked “Because I’d really like to
know!”
             “I guess…” Kirstin looked at Ashley, but he didn’t have such a
happy face on.
             “Good! Then we can go to the ultrasound together!” Tom exclaimed
  getting way too excited.
             “Maybe.” Kirstin was trying to control herself because Ashley
now had a really mad face on “We’ll see about that.”
             “Yeah, we’ll see, because we have to go now.” Ashley said
looking at Tom.
             “But, I still have so many things I wanna talk to you about,
Keekee.”
             “Yeah, but we have to go. Now. So…” Ashley informed.
             “Yes, Tom. We should go. But I’ll call you. We’ll… keep in touch
  I guess…” Kirstin looked down.
             “Yes! Definitely. We’re gonna have to. We’ve got a little baby
to worry about now.”
             “Yes.” Kirstin half-smiled and looked at Ashley “So, we’re going
” she said motioning for the door.
             “Ok.” Tom said “Call me then. And I’ll call you.”
             “Alright.” Kirstin said. Right after that, Tom leaned in to kiss
her on the cheek. Ashley watched that while a fist was forming in his left
hand.
             “Bye.” Tom waved as the couple left the place. Ashley and Tom
didn’t even exchange a look after the kiss on the cheek.

             Once they were outside the restaurant, Ashley screamed in
disbelief.
             “Oh, my God! I can’t believe the nerve of that guy!” he placed
both his hands on his face and just shook it “How dare him kiss you right in
front of me!”
             “Ash…” Kirstin said sitting on the passenger seat.
             “Oh, don’t you Ash me, Kirstin! You did nothing! Nothing to stop
him from being, oh, all so Tom-like, so cute, so nice. It was like he never
cheated on you!  Or that you were cool about the fact that he did cheat on
you. What was that?” Ashley raised his voice.
             “I… I don’t know…”
             “Yes, that’s right. You don’t know! Kirstin…” Ashley screamed
again and hit the wheel.
             “Ash, please…” Kirstin was about to cry and Ashley saw that.
             “Oh, don’t cry. By all means, don’t. Why would you? Your perfect
little former fiancée just agreed to raise this baby with you. Why would you
cry when everything is just fitting so perfectly, right?”
             “Ashley…” Kirstin started, but didn’t know what to say. Why was
Ashley being so mean to her?
             “What?”
             “Why… I… why are you acting like this?” Kirstin stuttered.
             “Oh, you don’t know! I mean what a shocker! Why do you think,
Kirstin? Huh? Is it possible that I’m acting like this because it felt to me
like I was a third wheel there in the restaurant while you two were
practically setting a date to go do the ultrasound to find out the sex of
the baby? No… perhaps that’s not it. It can’t be it. Hm… Then, maybe, it was
because you were, oh, so nice with the man that got you pregnant and then
cheated on you. No… that can’t be it either. Because that’s normal behavior,
right? It’s alright to hate the guy who cheated on you, UNLESS he gets you
pregnant. Then you can’t hate him at all. You have to act like nothing had
happened, because, for crying out loud, you’re carrying his baby! You can’t
argue! You are gonna be parents! Perfect parents!” Ashley shook his head
“Well, Kirstin, pardon me if I think that all that happened in that
restaurant SUCKED!” Ashley yelled. He couldn’t face Kirstin. He didn’t even
realize when a tear dropped from her face. She soon wiped it away.
             “You know what?” Kirstin soon got it under control and raised
her tone of voice “I don’t need this BULLSHIT coming from you right now!
This RIDICULOUS jealousy of yours. Get real, Ashley! I already told you AND
Tom that I wanted YOU to raise this baby with me. YOU! What else do you want
me to do, huh? I’m sorry if I treated Tom nicely. I’m sorry if I want this
baby to have his REAL FATHER around! Now just stop this fucking car and get
yourself a fucking cab back to your fucking hotel!” Ashley immediately
pulled over.
             “Great! Just great! You know why? Because, this way, you can go
back to waiter boy in the restaurant in time to get your engagement back on
” Ashley got out of the car “And see if I care!” he yelled and then slammed
the door behind him.
Kirstin was left alone in the car, crying her eyes out.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

i just wanted to say hi to everyone. Hope everyone is doing good.

Hey there!

     I can't thank you guys who's reviewing enough! You are always so great!
Thanks so much! Especially to Jen, who's always the best! Thanx Jen!
     So... chapter 27... review!!! yourfanfic@... or
http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Oh! Just for the record, everything I wrote about Kirstin's condition
and about the bleeding and all, pure fiction. I really know nothing about
medical stuff. Nothing. Zero. So I made all that stuff up. Don't know if it
can happen, but probably not! LoL So, just to let you guys know, pure
fiction, totally out of my mind. But it seems believable, though. I think I
did a good job. LoL
     Love
     Fernanda

------------

~*~ Chapter 27 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOSPITAL – MAR. 16TH, 2002 – SATURDAY

             Ashley, Grace and Tom were following the doctor around the
hospital’s corridors. The doctor stopped and they could see through a glass
window, Kirstin lying on a hospital bed inside this room. Ashley placed his
hand on the glass, looking tenderly and worried at Kirstin. He didn’t stop
staring at Kirstin when the doctor started to talk.
             “Ok. We were able to stop the bleeding. We monitored her and the
baby during the whole process.”
             “How is she, doctor?” Grace asked.
             “She’s fine. She is really weak right now because she lost a lot
of blood, but she’s fine. Everything is fine with her.”
             “And…” Tom swallowed hard before asking “How’s the baby?” for
the first time since he got there, Ashley turned his look from Kirstin to
the doctor.
             “Well… it is also fine.” Ashley took a deep breath, relieved,
and went back to look at Kirstin “We are still monitoring both Miss Addams
and her baby. Miss Addams is out of danger, but the baby’s situation is
still fragile. We don’t know how it is gonna be yet. It is fine right now,
but the situation can change, because Kirstin’s weak due to the blood lost.
And she is what keeps this baby alive.”
             “But… why did this happen? Why did she start bleeding?” Tom
asked.
             “Well, we found in her blood a type of salt that can cause the
uterus’ walls to weaken. The salt probably came from a medicine she’s taking
” The doctor took a look at Kirstin’s file “But it’s weird, because the
level of the salt we found in her blood was really high. The salt, in lower
doses, wouldn’t cause the uterus' walls to weaken, but the level is too high
”
             “It’s her stomachache medicine.” Ashley informed, not looking at
the doctor.
             “Do you know the name of that medicine?” the doctor asked, ready
to take notes.
             “Lexol.” Ashley answered “She’s been taking those since she was
in highschool. And she told me that some times her stomachaches were so
terrible that she would take 3 pills at once.”
             “Ok.” the doctor wrote the name of the drug done “So, I’m almost
certain that’s it. I’m gonna go, because I have some other patients, but
I’ll work on her case a little more before I come back. You can all go
inside now.” Ashley was already opening the door when the doctor spoke again
“I’m sorry, but are any of you relatives?” all the three of them shook their
heads “Oh, so, I need the father of the baby to sign this paper here.” the
doctor handed the pen to Ashley and showed him the paper.
             “I’m the father of the baby.” Tom took the pen out of Ashley’s
hand.
             “I’m sorry.” the doctor apologized and looked at Ashley, who
didn’t have a happy face on. While Tom signed the paper, Ashley went inside
the room, Grace by his side.
             “Oh, my God.” Grace started to cry when she saw Kirstin’s face.
She didn’t look too good. She was pale and it was red below her eyes and her
nose, probably because she had been crying the whole time.
             Ashley looked at her and that moment was the first time he burst
into tears. He sat on a chair right beside Kirstin’s bed and held her hand.
He didn’t say anything. He just stared at her.
             Tom got into the room and started crying too. Grace and Tom were
standing at the foot of the bed.
             “Did the doctor say anything else?” Grace asked Tom.
             “Not really.” Tom answered.

             They kept like that, no one saying anything, until a nurse came
in. The same female nurse that helped Grace gets Kirstin inside the hospital

             “Hello. My name is Claire.” this brunette girl around 30 said
with a smile on her face.
             “Hello.” the three of them said in unison.
             “Oh, don’t be so sad. She’s fine. And the baby is also fine.”
she said, pulling the covers up to Kirstin’s chest “See this?” she pointed
to a monitor “This line here is Kirstin’s heart and this one below is the
baby’s heart.” the three of them looked up and saw these two lines going up
and down.
             “Why is the baby’s heart only 57 while Kirstin’s is 103?” Tom
asked.
             “Well, he is really weak right now. Miss Addams lost a lot of
blood that was feeding him.”
             “He? Him?” Ashley asked from his seat.
             “Yeah.” the nurse frowned “You don’t know it’s a baby boy?” she
looked at Ashley.
             “No!” Tom said, apparently happy.
             “Well, it is.” the nice nurse smiled.
             “I can’t believe it!” Tom smiled big “I’ve always wanted a boy.
I prayed it was a boy.”
             “So, it’s your baby then?” Claire asked, and then looked at
Ashley puzzled.
             “Yes. It’s mine. A boy!” Tom still had the big smile on.
             “Shhh! Try to keep it down.” the nurse grinned “Miss Addams
needs to sleep.”
             “Sorry.” Tom calmed down, but the smile was still on.
             “Ok. I have to go now, I’ll came back later to switch her
medication.”
             “Ok. Thanks.” Grace said.
             “Oh, sorry, just one more thing.” the nurse came back “The visitor’s
hour is gonna end soon. So, after that, as there are no relatives here, only the
father of the baby will be allowed to stay.”

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hey!

     Ok... thanx everyone who's often reviewing, like... Amy, AnnKa, Min,
Barbie, Anne, Jamie, Patricia, Eisha, Rachel, Tati, Losy and the thousands
of Jens! :) Love you all and forgive me if I forgot to put your name among
these... Sorry!
     Well... so... chapter... 25. Wow! 25! Can you guys believe it? Wow... I
m sending chapters way too fast! We're already at chapter 25 and I've been
sending chapters of this fic out for what? Only a month? Wow...
     Anyways... so chapter 25 is here. A really good chapter if I may add! :)
You'll find out who the baby was conceived and a little cliffhanger at the
end... of course! Wouldnt be my fic without it! :)
     So... let me go, but first, REVIEWS!!!! Send them to my email addy
yourfanfic@... or sign my guestbook http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
There you can find all the chapters of all my fics. Also, dont forget that,
if you're reading this from a group that is NOT a fanfiction one, then do
NOT send your review to the group, because I'm on 'no email', alright?
     GTG, but see ya!
     Love
     Fernanda

-----------

~*~ Chapter 25 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – MAR. 15TH, 2002 – FRIDAY

             Kirstin took a look at her reflection at the mirror. Her
pregnant belly was starting to show up. She was going into her 4th month.
She placed her right hand on her belly and stroked it up and down. It was
like she already knew the baby.
             Tom and she still haven’t gone to the doctor to do the
ultrasound and find out the sex of the baby. Kirstin had been pretty busy
making up all the classes and work hours she missed during the difficult
times she went through with her engagement cancellation and the pregnancy
news. But she and Ashley couldn’t have been better. He was now in California
  making the final arrangements on the album and he’d get there the following
day. She couldn’t wait. It had been a week and a half since Ashley left.
             Her relationship with Tom was healthy too. He didn’t try any
moves on Kirstin. After her talk with Ashley in his hotel room, she had made
it pretty clear to Tom that she was only accepting that arrangement of them
for the sake of the baby. And Tom seemed to be satisfied with that.
Apparently, he had gotten himself a girlfriend, but Kirstin didn’t want to
get into the details, so she didn’t know a lot about that.

             “Hey.” she said when she opened the door.
             “Hey. So… how are you doing?” Grace asked, getting into
Kirstin’s loft.
             “Good. I was just looking at the mirror, and doesn’t my belly
look huge?” Kirstin turned so Grace could see the side of Kirstin’s belly.
             “It’s not huge… I mean, you can see you’re pregnant, but it’s
not huge. It’s only 3 months old, Kirstin!”
             “In 4 days, it will be 4.”
             “How…” Grace frowned “How do you know? How do you know when it
was conceived?”
             “By the month the doctor said it was conceived, November, I know
when it was.”
             “But how?”
             “Because I know that that day we weren’t using a condom.”
             “What? Why?” Grace asked shocked “So this pregnancy it’s your
guys’ fault, really? I thought the condom had just, I don’t know… ripped.
Not that you weren’t using one!”
             “Well… we were about to get married, Grace. And… well… we
actually didn’t have too much time to put it on.” Kirstin looked down and
turned to go to the kitchen.
             “What do you mean?” Grace asked, clearly curious.
             “I… it was my birthday, ok? November 20th? And we had gone out
for dinner. And he decided to do something crazy. So… we did it in my car.
In the parking lot.” Kirstin lowered her tone of voice.
             “I can’t believe it! I would never take you as a sex adventure
girl. You’re so… right!”
             “Yeah, well… it wasn’t my idea. It was Tom’s. He said I was
turning 21, so I should do something crazy for a change.”
             “Well, I guess the result that came out of it was even crazier.”
             “Yeah…” Kirstin shrugged “And, somehow, he gave me a present
that day.”
             “Yeah…” Grace nodded.
             “But I don’t regret it. I love this baby. Nonetheless, it was
the best gift I’ve ever gotten.”
             “I’m glad you feel that way.” Grace smiled sympatheticly “So…
what are we doing tonight?” she asked her friend, so they’d change the
subject.
             “I don’t know… I was just thinking of staying in. What do you
say? Watch a movie or something.”
             “Sure. Ok. Great.”
             “Good. Then let me just put on my pajama and we’ll find
something on pay-per-view.”
             “Ok. I’ll go change too.”


    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – MAR. 16TH, 2002 – SATURDAY

             It was 11 am when Kirstin stretched and opened her eyes. She was
lying on the couch, while Grace was on a mattress on the floor.
             “Grace?” Kirstin asked, touching her friend.
             “What?” Grace asked all grumpy.
             “It’s 11.”
             “Wow.” Grace said while stretching “That late, huh?” Grace was
now yawning.
             “Yeah… I guess we needed this sleep. I was so tired.”
             “Yeah, me too.” Grace sat up on the mattress “When is Ashley
getting here?”
             “He said he’d be here around 2, 3 pm.”
             “Oh, ok. And what are we doing today?”
             “Don’t know. Wanna go shopping? We can grab some lunch there at
the mall.”
             “Yeah, sure.”
             “So, let’s change, because then it will get too late and Ash is
coming!” Kirstin said all excited.
Grace stood up and trailed to the kitchen. Kirstin yawned and then stood up.
The minute she stood up, she felt a piercing pain in her stomach. She
screamed in pain. The next minute, when she looked down and Grace was
already by her side, she saw all this blood coming from her inner thighs.
She screamed even more, maybe because she was horrified of seeing all that
blood, maybe for the pain, but when she looked at Grace, her friend was
already with her purse and Kirstin’s purse on her shoulder and getting the
car keys from the kitchen counter.
“Come. Here, put your arms here. Come on.” Grace said scared, but apparently
with everything under control, and wrapped Kirstin’s arm on her shoulder,
leading her to the door.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hey...

     So, I see I got a good response from you guys from last chapter. Good.
Good... Surprised some people, didnt surprise others. All in all, good
response...
     Well... here's chapter 26 then. Let me know what u think of it also,
alright? yourfanfic@... or http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     GTG, but TTYL!
     Love
     Fernanda

--------------

~*~ Chapter 26 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOSPITAL – MAR. 16TH, 2002 – SATURDAY

             Grace stopped the car in front of the hospital doors. She got
out and headed straight inside.
             “Can someone please help me? I’ve got a pregnant woman in my car
and she’s bleeding. I need someone to help me get her out of the car.” Grace
screamed to no one in particular and, immediately, 1 male and another female
nurse came running, following Grace to her car.
             “What happened?” the male nurse asked as he put Kirstin’s right
arm around his neck and carried a screaming Kirstin inside the hospital.
             “I don’t know. One minute, she was sitting and everything was
fine. The other, she was up, screaming and bleeding. I don’t know… I…” Grace
started to shake her head. She didn’t know what the problem was. She was so
confused.
             “Ok, ma’am. Just be calm.” the female nurse was trying to calm
Grace down “What’s your name, sweetie?” she asked Kirstin, who was just
screaming and crying.
             “Kirstin. Kirstin Addams.” Grace answered for her friend, seeing
that Kirstin was in no condition to answer anything at that moment.
             The male nurse placed Kirstin on a gurney, while the female one
went to get a doctor.
             “Please, don’t let anything happen with my baby.” for the first
time, Kirstin was able to talk. After she said that, the screams and the
crying took over her once again.
             “We’ll do everything possible to prevent that, ma’am.” the male
nurse said.
             A doctor approached and asked the nurses in charge what was the
problem. They told them what they knew and they started to transport her
gurney, Grace always behind them. The female nurse stopped and told Grace
she was not allowed in that part of the hospital. So Grace was left behind.
             Only at that moment, Grace was able to start crying. She had to
be strong for her and for Kirstin while she was in her company. She didn’t
want to scare Kirstin, she wanted to make her friend feel secure, if that
was possible. But now that Kirstin was no where in sight, she couldn’t
pretend anymore. She was worried. Too worried. What if something happened to
the baby? Worse, what if something happened to Kirstin?
             She looked at her watch. It was noon. Ashley was probably in the
airplane. She wouldn’t be able to call him. So she called the other person
who should also be there.

             After what seemed to have been 10 minutes, Grace saw Tom run
inside the hospital and head straight to get information from a nurse. She
called out his name and he went straight in her direction.
             “What happened? How’s Kirstin? How’s the baby?” Tom asked, worry
clear in his face.
             “I don’t know.” Grace was still crying “They just carried her
inside and I haven’t heard from the doctor ever since.”
             “Oh, My God. Grace, for God’s sake, what happened? Why is she
here?”
             “I don’t know what happened. We woke up, everything was fine,
then, she started bleeding.”
             “She was bleeding?” Tom screamed. Grace just nodded and cried
even more “Oh, my God. Please, God, don’t let anything happen to them.
Please, God.” Tom put both his hands together and stared up.

             “Excuse me.” a nurse came near them “Are you two with Kirstin
Addams?” she asked kindly.
             “Yes!” the two, who were sitting, answered in unison.
             “I would need one of you to fill out this form for me, please.
With Miss Addams’ information.”
             “I’ll do that.” Grace said, taking the paper from the nurse’s
hand.
             “When you’re done, just hand it back to me. I’ll be right over
there.” the nurse pointed to the reception.
             “Ok. Thank you.” Grace tried to put on a smile, but wasn’t able
to.

             Grace filled out the paperwork and handed it back to the nurse
after 10 minutes. Then she went to sit back on a chair next to Tom.
             “What time is it already?” Tom asked Grace.
             “It’s 2:15. Oh, my God! Is that the time? I have to go call
Ashley!”
             “What?” Tom looked at her.
             “I have to call Ashley.”
             “He doesn’t know already?”
             “No. He was coming to New York today and when all this happened,
he was probably in the airplane, so I couldn’t call him. But he was supposed
to get here at 2 or 3, so I’m gonna try his cell phone now. I’ll be right
back, ok?”
             “Yeah…”
             Grace took Kirstin’s purse and headed to a corner near the
restrooms. She got Kirstin’s cell phone out of her purse and searched for
Ashley’s cell phone number.
             “Hey, baby.” she heard a voice say after 7 rings.
             “Ashley! Thank God, I thought you weren’t gonna answer it.”
             “Who’s this?” Ashley asked confused. He saw Kirstin’s number on
his caller-id but he was hearing someone else’s voice.
             “It’s Grace.”
             “Oh, hey, Grace.” then it hit Ashley. Grace was calling from
Kirstin’s cell phone. Something was wrong “What happened?” he immediately
asked.
             “Ashley…” Grace start to say, trying hard to hide from Ashley
that she was crying, but her voice was too shakey “I’m at the hospital right
now. Sacred Heart Hospital. At 6th avenue.”
             “Kirstin. Something happened to Kirstin. What happened to
Kirstin?” Grace could notice the tension in his voice and then she heard he
say to someone else, probably to a taxi driver ‘Sacred Heart. 6th avenue.’
             “I don’t know how she is, Ashley. Just get here. When you do,
we’ll talk.”
             “Please, Grace. What’s going on?” Ashley’s voice was shakey now
too.
             “I don’t know.” Grace cried even harder “They brought her inside
and I haven’t heard from them yet.”
             “But what happened? Why is she at a hospital?”
             “She was bleeding, Ashley.” Grace wiped some tears away “She was
bleeding a lot.”
             “Oh, my God. Ok. I’m coming. Please, if you hear anything from
the doctor, call me, alright? I don’t know how long it will take for me to
get there.”
             “Ok. I will. Bye.”

             Kirstin looked at her watch. It was 2:35 and Ashley still hadn’t
gotten there.
             “What is taking Ashley so long?” Grace asked.
             “Probably traffic.” Tom answered. He was now pacing around.
             “But it’s Saturday! There shouldn’t be traffic!” Grace exclaimed

             “Then I don’t know.”
             “Oh, thank God!” Grace got up as soon as she saw Ashley enter
the hospital with his bags.
             “Any news?” he said after dropping his bags and hugging Grace.
             “No.” Grace was calmer. She wasn’t crying anymore “Nothing yet.”
             “Hey.” Ashley raised his brows to Tom and Tom did the same.
             “Hey, man.”
             “Where’s the nurse? I wanna talk to the nurse.”
             “That one helped us out when we got here.” Grace pointed to
where the male nurse was.
             “Ok. Stay here. I’ll see if I can find something out.” Ashley
trailed to the male nurse.
             “Why didn’t you tell me the nurse was right there? I would have
gone to talk to him myself!” Tom said to Grace angrily. Grace didn’t answer
him. She wasn’t gonna help Tom start this little macho-fight with Ashley to
see who cared most about Kirstin and the baby. She just sat down again.

             After a couple of minutes, Ashley came back.
             “So?” Tom approached him.
             “He said that Kirstin is sleeping now. They took care of the
bleeding. But he can’t really tell us how she and the baby are. The doctor
will come talk to us soon. After that, we’ll be able to see her.”
             “Oh, good!” Grace breathed relieved.
             “Yeah…” Ashley sat down beside Grace.
The three of them stood in silence.

             “Are you with Kirstin Addams?” a male doctor asked Grace and
Ashley who were sitting, looking down. Tom approached them the minute he
heard the doctor speak.
             “Yes!” Ashley answered and stood up. So did Grace.
             “Will you come with me, please?” the doctor asked and led Ashley
  Grace and Tom to Kirstin’s room.




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hello people!

     Yep! I'm back. I thought I'd be back only next Monday, but I got some
time tonight to write and the incredible Taryn already returned this chapter
corrected in like, 15 minutes... THANKS GIRL!
     So... REVIEWS must be send to my email yourfanfic@... or sign the
guestbook at http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net Dont forget that the reviews
matter!!!
     Love
     Fernanda

------------------

~*~ Chapter 15 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – FEB. 14TH, 2001 – Tuesday

             “I came as soon as possible. What happened, girl?” Grace said
after shutting the door behind her and seeing Kirstin lying on her couch.
             “I’m pregnant.”
             “What?” Grace asked incredulous. She couldn’t believe that so
much was happening with her best friend’s life in such a short period of
time.
             “I’m pregnant. And it’s Tom’s baby.” Kirstin cried out.
             “Oh, my God! Kirstin! What’s going on with your life? Oh, my
God!” Grace sat on the couch and placed Kirstin head on her lap.
             “I know. Oh, my God. What have I done to deserve all this? My
life was so perfect a month ago. I had the next 10 years of my life all
figured out. I was getting married and was gonna have a perfect job with a
perfect husband that loved me so much. Now look at me! I cried every single
day this last week.”
             “K, baby, everything will be alright. I really don’t know why
all of this is happening to you, but I know it will pass. Ashley is with you
now.”
             “I’m not so sure anymore.” Kirstin looked up at her friend.
             “What? What happened?”
             “I told him. About the pregnancy. And about the baby being Tom’s
”
             “Oh, my. And what did he…” Grace got interrupted by Kirstin.
             “He just… took off. Said he needed sometime to think about all
this.”
             “But… can you blame him? I mean…”
             “No. I don’t blame him.” Kirstin cut her friend off one more
time “I guess he’s right. I guess I would have done the same thing. He’s too
young to take care of someone else’s baby.” Kirstin turned her face and let
a tear drop.
             “Yeah… but he’ll think about it and will come back to you. You
guys can’t be apart again. He’ll see that.”
             “I really hope so…” Kirstin sighted.

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOTEL – FEB. 14TH, 2001 – Tuesday

             Ashley opened the door to his room and, once inside, collapsed
onto the bed. He stared at the ceiling, hundreds of thoughts going through
his mind. Seconds later, he heard a knock on the door. He put all his
efforts into getting up and heading to the door.
             “Saw you entering your… What’s up with that face?” Erik asked
when he noticed Ashley’s look. Dan was right beside him. Ashley just shook
his head and collapsed again onto the bed.
             “What’s wrong, Ash?” Dan asked, shutting the door behind him.
             “Yeah, you look… tense.” Erik pointed out.
             “Yeah, well…” Ashley shook his head “You’re not gonna believe it
when I say it.”
             “Try us.” Dan suggested.
             “Kirstin is pregnant.”
             “What?” the two said in union.
             “Yeah.” Ashley said.
             “But… how could you…” Erik started but got cut off by Ashley.
             “With Tom’s baby.”
             “What?” the two asked incredulous again in union.
             “That’s all there is to it. She’s pregnant with the waiter boy’s
baby.”
             Erik looked at Dan that returned the glance. They stood in
silence for a while.
             “Hm… And Ash, what are you gonna do about it?” Dan asked to
break the silence.
             “I don’t know.” Ashley’s glare was glued to the ceiling.
             “What did you tell Kirstin when she told you that?” Erik
inquired.
             “That I needed some time to think about it.”
             “And what did she said about that?”
             “She said she understood my position. And also said that she’s
gonna raise this baby with or without me, but that she’d like me to be by
her side.”
             “Hm…” Dan didn’t know what else to say.
             “And, ahm… Did you think about that already?” Erik asked.
             “Somewhat. I really don’t know how to react to all that. I mean…
how am I suppose to react?” Ashley was still looking up at the ceiling.
             “I really don’t know, man. It’s a really tough one.” Dan
informed his friend.
             “Yeah… I just think you should really think about that. It’s
really important that you make a decision and tell Kirstin as soon as
possible, because if you don’t wanna be part of that, she’s gonna have to
start preparing herself psychologically, because it ain’t gonna be easy for
her to raise alone the child of a man who cheated on her days before the
wedding.” Erik expressed himself.
             “Yeah, I guess…” Ashley still couldn’t face anything but the
ceiling.
             “So… we better leave you to it. If you need us, we’re gonna be
in our room, alright? Just call or come over. And let us know when you make
up your mind.” Dan said trailing to the door.
             “Will do. Thanks guys.”
             “No problem, bro.” Erik said and closed the door.
             Ashley sat up with his eyes closed. He then opened his eyes and
stared at his relationship ring. He twisted it around his finger. He had to make
up his mind. And soon.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Ok... chapter 23.
     Reviews: yourfanfic@... or http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

----------------------

~*~ Chapter 23 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – FEB. 15TH, 2001 – FRIDAY

             Kirstin knocked on the door and waited until someone answered.
             “Oh, my God! What happened?” Grace asked, motioning for Kirstin
to get into the house. The tears were still falling and Kirstin was a mess.
             “I guess… it’s over…” Kirstin stuttered, she couldn’t say
anything straight.
             “What? Is… Ashley?” Grace asked worried, helping her friend sit
on the couch. Kirstin just nodded “What happened, baby? Oh, my God! The
meeting with Tom…” Grace took a deep breath. She knew something would happen
at this meeting, she just didn’t warn Kirstin. Now she regretted not telling
anything “Tell me what happened exactly.”
             “I don’t know… I mean… everything seemed ok at the restaurant.
Ok, so they were arguing a bit, but that’s normal when you put Ashley and
Tom in the same place at the same time. So I thought when we left the
restaurant, that was as far as things would go. Oh, was I wrong?” Kirstin
shook her head and looked at her friend “I don’t know. I think… I don’t
know! But out of nowhere, Ashley started to say terrible things to me, like,
I had made him feel like a third wheel during my conversation with Tom. And
that’s not true, G. Not true at all. I told Tom that Ashley would be by my
side! That that wouldn’t change. Ashley would be there, whether Tom liked it
or not. But in the car, Ashley snapped at me! Like… from out of nowhere!
Telling me that I was flirting with Tom. Come on! I wouldn’t flirt with Tom!
I know what he did to me. I wouldn’t go back to him! I just want Tom to be
around the baby. That doesn’t mean I wanna get back with him! But Ashley
clearly didn’t understand that.” Kirstin placed both her hands on her face
and continued crying.
             “K, baby, but what happened after? Like… where’s Ashley?”
             “I asked him to leave me, that I didn’t need to hear his
jealousy bullshit talking, that he could just go back to the hotel. And so
he did. He got out of the car and I just drove back here.”
             “Good. You did good driving back here. You don’t wanna be alone
right now.”
             “No, I don’t.” Kirstin hugged her friend.
             “That’s alright, honey. But I think you should talk to Ashley.
Clearly he misunderstands you ,so you've gotta make him understand what
really happened.”
             “Why? I am not wrong here, G! He is! He should come to me!”
             “K, could you just… leave your pride aside just this once? You
can’t loose Ashley! Isn’t he important to you?” Kirstin nodded.
             “The most important person right now, I believe.”
             “See? You can’t loose him! Even if you think you are right, it’s
just what I told you, he probably didn’t understand what happened in that
restaurant. So you gotta explain him that. I’m pretty sure he’ll be ok with
Tom being around. Ashley is a great guy. We both know that. Just gotta give
him a chance to hear what actually happened. From your point of view.”
             “I guess…”
             “No, that’s what you’re gonna do! I’m telling you to do this! I
can’t see you break up with this guy again. I’m pretty sure you guys deserve
each other. So, that can’t end just like that. From a stupid jealousy
fight!” Grace was trying to help her friend. And she meant every word. She
didn’t want to see Kirstin hurt again.
             “Ok…” Kirstin said, trying to control herself “G?”
             “Yeah?” Grace asked from the kitchen.
             “My stomach hurts.”
             “Oh, no. You still have those pains?”
             “Well… yeah. It’s not going to disappear just because I’m
carrying a baby now. That’s what the doctor said anyways.”
             “Oh… and you have been through a lot tonight.” Kirstin nodded
“Do you have your medicine with you?”
             “No. But that’s ok. I better get going anyway. I’ll take it when
I get home. Thanks, G. For everything, girl.”
             “Oh, come on! You know I’ll always be here.”
             “Yeah… That’s why I love you.” Kirstin said, heading to the door

             “I love you too, sweety.” Grace hugged Kirstin.
             “Ok, then. We’ll talk later.”
             “Alright.” Grace opened the door to Kirstin.
             “See ya.” Kirstin waved and got into the elevator.


    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOTEL

             “Ok… just… get here!” Ashley said after Dan opened the door of
his room. Erik and Dan were sharing a room, so they both just followed
Ashley to where he was going, which was his own room.
             “What happened, man?” Erik asked when they were both inside
Ashley’s room.
             “Oh…” Ashley started, pacing around the room “I just… blew up!”
             “With Kirstin?” Dan questioned.
             “Yeah, with Kirstin.”
             “What exactly happened?” Dan asked again.
             “Oh… That waiter boy happened! Man…”
             “Ashley, for crying out loud, why when you explode like that,
does it always comes back to the waiter boy?” Dan couldn’t understand his
friend.
             “Because he’s always a problem! He’s never gone for good! He’s
always there!”
             “So… I’m thinking this meeting didn’t go quite well…” Erik
stated the obvious.
             “You think?” Ashley looked mad at him.
             “But what happened? Can you just answer that simple question?
What happened?” Dan wanted to know the reason he was acting the way he was.
             “Oh, a flirtation between Tom and Kirstin. That’s what happened!
Right in front of me!”
             “That can’t be.” Erik shook his head.
             “Yeah, I’m pretty sure you got that wrong.” Dan tried to help.
             “Oh, you weren’t there, so you don’t know how clear the
flirtation was. It was right there! Even a blind man could see it!”
             “But…” Dan didn’t even know how to respond to that anymore “like
what? What were they saying to each other?”
             “Well… Tom said he wanted to raise the baby and Kirstin couldn’t
have been happier about it. And she sure didn’t make any effort to hide her
happiness either. I mean, yesterday she was all freaking out that she would
have to raise this baby alone. Now, she wasn’t satisfied just with me
raising this baby, she had to go to waiter boy for help too. Unbelievable!”
Ashley shook his head and continued his pace.
             “But… Ashley… He is the father of the baby.” Dan pointed out.
             “Ok, what side are you on? Because this is not helping me!”
Ashley snapped.
             “I’m sorry, Ash… It’s just that I wanna understand what really
happened. And I think I’ll have to agree with Kirstin on that. The kid has
to know his real father. It doesn’t matter if he’s gonna help out raising it
or not, he just has to be there.”
             “But the guy wasn’t there 2 days ago! He cheated on her for
crying out loud! I wouldn’t want that guy anywhere near me if I were
Kirstin!”
             “But it’s different, Ash. A baby is involved now.” Erik was
trying to open his friend’s mind for his own good.
             “Oh, forget it.” Ashley just turned his back on his friends “But
that wasn’t just that. Then they were talking about finding out the sex of
the baby, and Tom was proposing for them to go to the ultrasound together
and it was like I wasn’t even there! They were talking like I wasn’t there!
Come on! No one asked my opinion and I’m raising this baby too!”
             “Well… that sucks.” Dan said.
             “Yeah!” Ashley felt relieved that his friend was finally
agreeing with him.
             “But you snapped on her just because of that?” Erik wondered.
             “No…” Ashley started his pace.
             “Then what?” Erik asked again.
             “It’s just that… Kirstin went to the restroom and then I was
left alone with Tom and he… well… I don’t know. He started talking about how
this would be difficult for me, that this baby wouldn’t see me as a father
figure if Tom was gonna be there for him, that I would just be mommy’s
boyfriend and… I don’t know… I think I let him get to me. And I know I
shouldn’t have, but… he did. And it got me thinking, you know? I’m gonna
spend the rest of this baby’s life as mommy’s boyfriend?”
             “Ash, don’t be an idiot! Of course this guy was trying to get to
you! So you’d walk away and leave the way clear for him. And wasn’t that
what happened? Because I don’t see Kirstin anywhere around here.” Dan told
him.
             “Yeah, Ash. I think this guy got what he wanted. And you can’t
let that happen.”
             “You guys are right.” Ashley frowned, remembering how he had
told Kirstin she could go back to Tom that he wouldn’t care. And that wasn’t
true. Of course he’d care. He was carying already. And too much!
             “Of course we’re right! You can’t let that happen. Dude, you
cannot lose that girl again. I don’t think I’d handle you babbling about
loosing her like every other time that happened.” Erik shook his head.
             “I guess…”
             “No, you have to do this! You can’t let that guy win! You gotta
go talk to Kirstin! I’m telling you to go. I’m ordering you to go.” Dan
alleged.
             “Ok. I’ll do that.”
             “Ok. Don’t do that today. Today you stay here and think of what
you’re gonna say to her. And don’t do like last time that you went there in
the middle of the night. Just… think harder this time, alright?”
             “Ok. Thank you, guys. Again.” Ashley said, hugging his friends.
             “Yeah, yeah.” Dan said.
“I think we should start charging for all the advices we give you about your
relationship with Kirstin. Dan and I would make a fortune!” Erik joked.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hello everyone!

     Ok, I'm getting a great amount of reviews! Thanx so much everyone who's
been reviewing! Love you all! And keep those coming!
     So... chapter 16. A little cliffhanger right there at the end. Hope you
guys enjoy it. I know some people do, some dont... Oh, well...
     I'd also like to say that, depending on the amoung of feedback I get for
this chapter, I'll send chapter 17 tomorrow night, before my trip. So...
REVIEW if you wanna read another chapter tomorrow, or else, you'll have to
wait until next week...
     REVIEWS must be sent to yourfanfic@... or sing my guestbook at
http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

--------------

~*~ Chapter 16 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – FEB. 14TH, 2001 – Tuesday

             It was already 8 pm and Kirstin and Grace were at Kirstin’s loft

             “Kirstin… did you realize today is Valentine’s Day? Mark called
me this morning. I had forgotten all about it.” Grace asked checking the
calendar on top of Kirstin’s kitchen counter.
             “I totally forgot.” Kirstin said absentmindedly, more interested
in her thousand thoughts.
             “Yeah… I would too, with so much stuff going on in my life.”
Grace said more to herself than to Kirstin and closed the refrigerator door
after pouring herself some milk.
             “Yeah…” Kirstin was still confused. She decided to tell Grace
what was bothering her “G… do you… ahm… do you think I should… ahm… tell Tom
about it?” Kirstin played with her fingers.
             “You have to, K. Why? You weren’t considering it?” Grace was
surprised.
             “No.”
             “Really?” Grace sat beside Kirstin on the couch “You weren’t
gonna tell Tom you were pregnant with his baby?”
             “I never really thought about it. I didn’t think I wasn’t gonna.
It’s just that I’ve never even considered it.”
             “I understand. But you have to, K.”
             “I guess so. But what will I tell him? How will I tell him? Just
like that? From out of nowhere? We never even solved our problems. And I’m
just gonna come up to him and say ‘I know we haven’t spoken since that day,
but I don’t care, because you know what? I’m carrying your baby’? It doesn’t
seem right.”
             “No, it’s not right. You’re gonna have to come up with something
  You want to know why he did it, right?”
             “Why he cheated on me?” Kirstin asked and Grace nodded “Yeah, I
guess…”
             “So… you set a date and meet him and start with that. Tell him
that you wanna talk to him about it and then, you hear what he has to say
and just… I don’t know, forgive him…”
             “I can’t forgive him.” Kirstin played with her fingers again.
             “Then don’t. That’s alright. You don’t have to. But you can’t
argue with him and tell him about the baby all at once. You’re gonna have to
tell him about it gently.”
             “I guess…”
             “K, that’s what you gotta do. I’m gonna giving you an advice
here. I’m telling you what to do. You can’t just throw it in his face that
you’re pregnant.”
             “Yeah, you’re right. It’s just that… I’m a bit afraid…”
             “Afraid of what?”
             “I can’t really say. But afraid of Tom, I guess…” Kirstin looked
up at her friend.
             “You don’t have to be afraid of Tom. I know he cheated on you,
but he would never hit you or do anything to hurt you physically. He just
wouldn’t and we both know it.”
             “Yeah, he wouldn’t…” Kirstin looked down.
             “If you want to, I can go with you.”
             “Really?” Kirstin asked and Grace nodded “Oh, that would be so
great! So much better!”
             “Don’t worry, honey. I’ll totally go with you.”
             “Thanks, G.” Kirstin hugged her best friend.
             “My pleasure.” Grace hugged her back.


    NEW YORK CITY, NY – HOTEL – FEB. 14TH, 2001 – Tuesday

             Ashley was now pacing around the room. It looked like he was
undecided, but he had already made up his mind. He heard a knock on the door

             “Hey!” Erik greeted him and entered the room “So…”
             “I think I made up my mind.” Ashley was still pacing around the
room.
             “Really? Because you still look a bit confused.”
             “I’m just going through all I’m gonna say to Kirstin to see if
that’s what I really wanna say.”
             “Oh… do you think you’re gonna talk to Kirstin tonight?”
             “I wanted to. But I don’t know…” Ashley stopped and stared at
his friend “Do you think I should give it one more day? Sleep on it?”
             “I think. It’s a really important decision. You should take your
time. If you take one more day, it won’t make a difference.”
             “Yeah. I have to be certain of everything.” Ashley returned to
his pace.
             “You do.”
             “Ok. Then tomorrow I’m going there.”
             “Alright. Good. Now, Ashley, try to relax, man. You look really
tense. Go take a shower and then just lay down. It will do you good.”
             “I guess you’re right.”
             “Good. Let me go, then.”
             “Alright. Bye.” Ashley didn’t even mind showing Erik the door.
He took his shower and soon was on his bed, staring at the ceiling again.


    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – FEB. 14TH, 2001 – Tuesday

             It was past midnight already and Kirstin couldn’t sleep. She
turned over for the 57th time. Grace was sleeping with her in Kirstin’s bed.
She couldn’t help but think how wonderful it would be if she could trade
lives with Grace right now. Grace was happy with her baseball boyfriend,
didn’t have a baby to carry, her mind was clear of thoughts, no worries. All
Kirstin really wanted at that moment.
             Not being able to sleep, Kirstin decided to step downstairs.
She got into the kitchen and poured herself some chocolate milk. She took
the mug and headed to the couch.
When she sat down, she hesitated before taking the phone out of its base.
She took a sip of the milk and looked at the phone. She pressed the on
button and started to dial Tom’s cell number. She was about to hit the last
number when she decided to turn it off. She then realized the ring around
her finger. She stared at it. With the situation, she had even forgotten she
had that ring. Her relationship ring. She twisted it around her finger and
looked tenderly at it.
“Oh, my God! This is too difficult!” Kirstin looked at the phone one more
time and, one more time, hit the on button. She was about to start dialing
when she heard someone talking on the corridors.
Kirstin frowned, put the phone down and got up, heading to the door. She then
took a look at the peep-hole. Surprised, she opened the door. Ashley was
standing right in front of her.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hello everyone!

     Well, I'm really proud of you guys! I've got a great amount of reviews!
Thanx so much for reviewing!
     Now... before I go on my vacation trip, I'll send chapter 17 as I
promised I would if I got enough reviews. So here it is. It does havea
cliffhanger, so it will make you guys hang there for a whole week! Please,
dont be mad? LoL
     Now, it's not just because I'll be on a trip, that you guys shouldn't
review! I expect to ready a lot of reviews when I come back from my trip!
Please! My email addy is yourfanfic@... or sign the guestbook
http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Hope you guys like this chapter and hope I get a lot of reviews when I
get back...
     Love
     Fernanda

---------------------

~*~ Chapter 17 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – FEB. 14TH, 2001 – Tuesday

“Ok. I gotta talk.” Ashley said and entered the loft, before Kirstin could
even say a word. But even if she had to say a word, she didn’t know if she
would be able to. She didn’t expect to see Ashley so soon “Listen. Ever
since I left this loft this morning, I have done nothing but to think about
this situation.” Ashley still couldn’t look Kirstin in the eyes. He was
pacing around the couch “I couldn’t sleep tonight. And I guess we’re gonna
have to talk about sooner or later, so…” Kirstin stared at him, without
saying a word “Say something!” Ashley exclaimed.
“I… I don’t know what to say. I didn’t expect to see you anytime soon. In
fact, I…” Kirstin looked down and trailed to the couch “I didn’t expect to
see you anymore.” she played with her fingers. Ashley looked at her. She
seemed so tired. And you could tell by her eyes that she had been crying all
day long.
“Kirstin...” Ashley tried to start and took a deep breath to collect all his
courage “Kirstin.” he still didn’t know how to start “Kirstin. Here’s the
thing.” but he still didn’t know how to tell Kirstin what he had decided.
Kirstin was dying in anxiety, but didn’t wanna show it, so she had her back
to Ashley “As I already told you, I spent the whole day thinking. It wasn’t
easy.” Ashley let out an ironic chuckle.
“I know… I’ve been through that the whole day as well.” Kirstin informed
Ashley.
“So… I don’t know how to start this… This is so difficult!” Ashley hit the
couch. Kirstin let a tear fall. His actions weren’t helping Kirstin calm
down. He was tense, she was tense and the situation was tense.
“Just… say it, Ash. Ok? Just… spill it out. I can handle anything right now
” she tried to hide from him that she wiped a tear away.
“Ok. Kirstin, I have to confess that I’ve thought about marrying you and
starting my family with you. Actually, you’re the only girl that I’ve ever
thought about doing all that with. You’ve been the most important person in
my life ever since I first saw you. You’ve been a constant in my mind since
that day as well. And all this time after prom that I spent trying to find
you, it was like I was trying to find a part of me. And it hurt. Too much,
actually. Because I wasn’t complete. And then we finally get together and
then we break up. Then we get together again and this comes between us now.”
Ashley stopped pacing around the room and sat on a chair in front of the
couch Kirstin was sitting on “When I was looking for you after prom, my life
was difficult, but I kept going on because I knew sooner or later I was
gonna find you and life would be great. And that’s what happened when we
first got together. I was the happiest man alive. And then, when you broke
up with me, I was devastated. I tried to imagine my life without you from
that day on and it sucked. It had no meaning, because the meaning of it was
to find you and to be with you, but you didn’t want me. What would I do
next? Then I decide to go on with my life, despite the pain of not having
you with me. When I saw you with Tom, I couldn’t believe it. It was like I
had lost you for the worst person alive. I knew he wasn’t good for you.
Something told me he wasn’t good for you. I wanted to do something to warn
you about that guy, but I thought it was just jealousy. So I let that go.
And then I finally have the chance to have you back. I couldn’t believe I
had been given a second chance to make my life right this time. And then you
tell me you’re expecting his baby.” Ashley took a deep breath “I saw all my
dreams once again flushed down the toilet. And somehow it hurt more this
second time then the first one. Because now there was this baby’s life
involved. I wouldn’t just hurt you, this baby would suffer too without a
father. But then I kept thinking it was Tom’s baby and because of that, it
deserved it. Pure pride. I know. But how am I suppose to react?” Ashley
looked at Kirstin, who was looking down ever since he started talking. He
could see the tears fall from her eyes “So, I started to imagine my life
without you and all the dreams I had with you in my life disappearing. And
then I imagined my life with you and the baby, but I’ll always think of Tom
whenever I look at this child.” Ashley played with his fingers and Kirstin
saw that. She started to cry more “And I realized something after all this
thoughts.” Kirstin look up abruptly, but hopeless “I can’t not have you in
my life anymore. I’ve already been through that, I know it’ll be too painful
for me to go through that again. And if this baby is coming along, I’ll
accept it. I’ll accept everything that comes along with you. Every
responsibility. As long as you’re with me. Because I know that our love for
each other is too strong and it makes us too strong, so we are able to
overcome every situation that is presented to us. I don’t care what it is, I
just know that I wanna be with you. For always.” Ashley finished talking and
looked at Kirstin. She had her glare on Ashley, but didn’t say anything. It
was like she hadn’t understood what Ashley had just said, because she wasn’t
making any movements. Ashley kept staring at her too, to see if she’d snap
out of it.
“Ashley…” it took a while for Kirstin to start talking “I… I don’t know if
that’s what I want.”

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hello people!!!!

     So... anyways... not so many reviews for chapter 19. That really got me
upset. So I hope you do a better work on this chapter, alright? I havent
written chapter 21 yet and when I'l do it will all depend on how many
reviews I get for this chapter. So come on! Send your thoughts my way! The
email addy is yourfanfic@... or sign the guestbook at
http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Ok... cliffhanger is back. Yep... kind of a big one... hope you guys
like it. Let me know, alright?
     GTG, but we'll talk later!
     Love
     Fernanda

------------

~*~ Chapter 20 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – RESTAURANT – FEB. 15TH, 2001 – Wednesday

             “Did you realize we missed Valentine’s Day yesterday?” Kirstin
asked Ashley when they got out of the car in front of the restaurant where
they’d be meeting Tom.
             “No! Man! How could I forget?”
             “Yeah, well… it wasn’t an easy day for us.”
             “Yeah, can’t blame me.” Ashley took her hands in his and walked
into the restaurant “But I’ll make up to you.”
             “I know. You always do.” Kirstin smiled and kissed his lips
“He’s over there.” Kirstin pointed when they pulled back from the kiss.
             “Where?” Ashley scanned the place and found Tom sitting on a
stool at the bar “Oh.”
             “How are we gonna do this?” Kirstin stopped walking and looked
at Ashley “Do we go together or should I go first?”
             “That’s up to you, baby.”
             “Do you mind if I go by myself now? I wanna talk to him about
some stuff first. Then, when I tell him about the baby, I’ll call you.”
             “Yeah, sure. That’s fine.” Ashley smiled weakly and Kirstin
noticed he wasn’t so happy about that.
             “Sorry, it’s just that…”
             “No, really, K, go. I know you guys have a lot to talk about. Go
” Ashley smiled bigger this time and she just pecked him before going up to
Tom.
             Ashley sat on a stool far from Tom and watched as Kirstin got
closer to him.

             “Hey…” Kirstin said while sitting on a stool next to Tom.
             “Oh, Kirstin. Hi. Man, it’s so good to see you.” Tom hugged her
tight, but Kirstin didn’t hug him back. ‘This is gonna be hard.’ she thought
to herself.
  When Tom pulled away from the hug, he looked at Kirstin, who forced a smile
  He smiled back.
“Do you want something to drink?” he offered her.
“No, thanks.” she smiled weakly “Ok. Tom…”
“K, can I just tell how beautiful you look tonight? I mean… wow!” Kirstin
did look good. She was wearing a plain black dress and black boots “You
indeed are the most gorgeous girl I’ve ever seen. God… just looking at you
makes my heart ache. I can’t believe I lost you.” Tom looked deeply into her
eyes.
“Well… that was… inappropriate.” Kirstin looked down and smiled nervously.
“Why? You do look good and you are gorgeous, I just had to…”
“Ashley is right over there.” Kirstin looked at where Ashley was and Tom
turned around to look at the spot.
“Oh…” Tom looked down “Of course… Pretty boy.” he looked somewhat
disappointed.
“Tom, listen, you might have gotten the wrong impression when I told you I
wanted to talk to you this morning.”
“I guess…” he took a sip from his drink.
“Tom… ok. First things first.” Kirstin took a deep breath and stared at
Ashley as to gather courage to continue “Why did you do it?”
“Why did I do what?” Tom asked, but Kirstin just shot him a look, not saying
a word, and he understood she wasn’t buying it “Ok. Kirstin, I really don’t
know why I did it.”
“Well, you’re gonna have to do a lot better than that.” Kirstin said looking
down, the nervous smile never leaving her face.
“You know those people that have everything they’ve always wanted but, still
  they’re not satisfied?” Kirstin looked up at him “Well, I guess that’s what
happened to me. I had everything I’ve ever wanted since the first day I
first saw you. I had you. All to myself. We loved each other, I had a great
job, we had a place to live… We were getting married for crying out loud!
Our lives were perfect… Everything was just perfect. And then… I don’t know
why, but I decided to go and cheat on you. Like I wasn’t satisfied with all
I had. And that’s not what I was really feeling. I couldn’t be more
satisfying to have you with me. I prayed, actually prayed, for that day to
come that I’d have you with me. Man!” Tom hit the counter, but soon got it
under control. Kirstin got a little scared at that and saw Ashley standing
up to head toward them, but she soon shot him a glare as if asking him to
just stay where he was “Sorry. It’s just that… Man, I usually don’t regret
things I do, but this thing… Man… I couldn’t have been more stupid!” Tom
exclaimed “And you didn’t deserve it.”
“You’re right, Tom. I didn’t. I didn’t do anything to deserve getting
cheated on.” Kirstin was almost crying, but, still, her nervous smile was on

“I know you didn’t. That’s why I hate myself so much for doing that to you.
You are great. You are perfect. You are everything a guy can ever ask for in
a girl.”
“Not that, Tom. I’m not perfect as you’re saying I am. That’s not why I
didn’t deserve to be cheated on. I didn’t deserve it because I loved you. So
much. And when we were together, I loved only you. As hard as you may find
it to believe, during all that time we were together, I loved you and only
you. If I’ve had my doubts about my love for you, I wouldn’t have accepted
to marry you. But I was gonna marry you. And I was so happy about it. So
happy. It felt that my life was finally complete. That I didn’t need
anything else. I was marrying a perfect man, who loved me too much and who I
loved too much. That’s why my entire world fell apart when I saw that slut
with you at my apartment.”
“Kirstin…” Tom didn’t have anything left to say after that Kirstin speech “I
don’t even know why I brought her to your apartment.” Tom just looked down
and shook his head.
“Yes. That’s probably the worst part. You screwing that bitch in my loft.”
“Yeah, I know…” Tom looked down, clearly ashamed “I’m sorry. I know I can
never ask for your apology. That would be too much to ask.”
“You got that right…” Kirstin played with her fingers “I can never forgive
you for that, Tom.” Kirstin felt a tear drop from her right eye. She soon
wiped that away so Tom wouldn’t see her crying. He didn’t deserve her tears.
“I know you’ll never forgive me. And I understand that already. I just
wanted to tell you that I am sorry. I needed you to see how sorry I am that
I screwed everything up. It’s not something I’m proud of. I really ruined my
life. Because I just had a life when I was with you. I loved you way too
much and I screwed it. And now I have nothing left. And I know I messed up
with your life too, so…”
“Yes, you did.” Kirstin interrupted him.
“Yeah. I know. Sorry. But… you’re with pretty boy now, so things can’t be
bad, right?” Tom still didn’t like seeing Kirstin with Ashley. It would be
less painful to see her with anyone else but ‘that loser’, he thought.
“Well… don’t be so sure about that.” Kirstin started to play with her
fingers again.
“What do you mean?” Tom pulled her chin up.
Kirstin looked over at Ashley and with a hand gesture, asked him to go to
her. When Ashley got to where both of them were, he stood behind Kirstin,
with both his hands on her shoulders and just looked at Tom, not saying a
word.
“Tom… I’m pregnant with your baby.”


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hellooooooooo!

     Ok... so here's chapter 21. So... still, not so many review. Whats up
with that? That's why I send this chapter after a long while.
     And seriously now, I'm not sending chapter 22 until Sunday or Monday if
I dont get more reviews. Yeah... blackmail! LoL So, you all do me a favor
and review for chapter 21? You have until there to do that, so...
     Another cliffhanger here... Let's see what u guys think of this one...
     Also... thanx to Taryn and Stacie for correcting it. It's been a while
since I've last thanked you girls, so... THANKS!
     Reviews: yourfanfic@... or http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

-------------

~*~ Chapter 21 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – RESTAURANT – FEB. 15TH, 2001 – Wednesday

“Excuse me, what?” Tom looked and sounded surprised. He wasn’t sure he had
heard right “I didn’t…”
“She’s pregnant.” Ashley decided to answer for Kirstin “Unfortunately, with
your baby.” Kirstin looked down. So Ashley wasn’t still ok about that.
“Is that true, Kirstin?” Tom tried to make eye contact with Kirstin. He
still couldn’t believe the news. He didn’t know how to feel about that.
“Yes.” Kirstin looked up into his eyes “We’re gonna have a baby.” Kirstin
half-smiled.
“Oh, my God, Kirstin!” Tom rubbed his forehead “This is… huge! I mean, this
changes…”
“Everything.” Kirstin finished for him.
“Right. Yeah! I mean… it’s a baby! Our baby!” Tom smiled and took her hand.
So, he was happy about it. He was gonna have a baby with Kirstin. He
imagined it happening after they were married and all. But that didn’t
matter at that particular moment. All that mattered was that Kirstin was
carrying his baby! He couldn’t help but to feel thrilled.
Ashley had to make a huge effort not to ruin that moment. He knew that if he
did, Kirstin would be mad at him. But he didn’t like the idea of her holding
hands with Tom. Especially during that conversation. What if that touch
brought back some feelings?
And that was kind of what Kirstin had on her mind when Tom took her hand in
his. She didn’t want to get rid of his touch. ‘Wow.’ she thought for a
second before she heard Ashley clearing his throat. She instantly removed
her hand from Tom’s.
“Actually, Tom, we…” Ashley indicated him and Kirstin “Are gonna raise this
baby.”
“Like hell you will!” Tom raised his voice “It’s my child, not yours!”
“Well, you should have thought better than to cheat on Kirstin then.” Ashley
also raised his tone. Now some people at the bar were staring at them.
“Please, you two…” Kirstin warned “Stop that. People are starting to stare.
Stop it!”
“No, Kirstin. I’m sorry, but…” Tom stopped and got his mood back in track “I
can’t let my baby be raised by pretty boy over here. I’m sorry, but it’s my
child, I think I have the right to raise it.” Tom took her hand again.
Kirstin looked tenderly at their hands together. Ashley picked up on that.
“Listen, you gave your right up when you decided to take that other chick
back to Kirstin’s apartment. I’m sorry, waiter boy, but you gave your right
up a few weeks ago.” Ashley looked down at Kirstin for some support. Somehow
  that didn’t happen.
“Kirstin, listen.” Tom started, looking deeply into Kirstin’s eyes and still
holding her hand “I’m not gonna give up on my baby. I wanna be part of its
life. I won’t let only you and whoever is with you raise it. I wanna be
there too! It is my baby too! God… I can’t believe I’m having this
conversation!” Tom threw his hands up in disbelief “I’m the baby’s father! I
shouldn’t be having this conversation! It’s my right to raise it! It’s my
flesh and blood! It’s mine! Not… his!” Tom pointed at Ashley.
“Ok, now… If it wasn’t for this baby, you would have never seen Kirstin
again. So I don’t think…” Ashley started, pointing his finger at Tom, but
got cut off by Kirstin.
“Just… shut up you two!” Kirstin got up from her seat and placed both her
hands on her face “I can’t listen to you two arguing like that. Just…” and
just like that, she took off, trailing to the lady’s restroom.
“Now, see what you’ve done!” Tom looked disgusted at Ashley.
“Oh, yeah! What I’ve done! Can’t you see this is entirely your fault? You
got her pregnant and then cheated on her!” Ashley defended himself.
“I wouldn’t have cheated on her if I knew she was pregnant!”
“Oh, yeah! That was sweet to say! Really nice going!” Ashley shook his head.


Kirstin got into a stall and closed the door. She sat on the toilet and
brought her knees to her chest. She didn’t cry though. She thought she would
  but she was too confused and too mad at the same time to even cry.
‘What were they thinking? Fighting like that… Pathetic!’ she thought while
shaking her head ‘Oh, man. Now what do I do? Tom’s reaction was just so… not
what I expected. He was just so… sweet. Sweet? Tom?’ Kirstin frowned and
continued on her trail of thoughts ‘So, yeah… Maybe sweet. He really is
happy with the baby. I thought he’d freak out! But… he wants to be there. He
wants to be a father. And it would be so much easier with him than with
Ashley.’ Kirstin stopped, regretting what she had just thought ‘No, Kirstin!
Don’t start! You can’t! Ashley is the right one for this baby. Tom, of
course, he’s the father, he will be around, that’s his right as he totally
made that clear, but Ashley is the one that’s gotta be by your side. He is
the right choice. Right?’ Kirstin nodded ‘Yeah… He’s the right choice.’ she
continued nodding, but somehow, things weren’t exactly clear for her ‘So… Ok
  Ashley. Right. But… What was that when Tom touched me? Was that… No, no, no
  He made you suffer. Too much. And you don’t wanna go that way again. He
doesn’t deserve you. You don’t like him. Not really. You’re just confused
with all that’s going on. So, ok. You’re gonna be with Tom then.’ Kirstin
smiled and then shook that smile off ‘Not Tom! Ashley! God…’
Kirstin spent another 10 minutes in the restroom, going through everything,
every detail over and over.
She then collected her thoughts and decided to tell the boys her decision.
Was that the right one?

When she got out off the restroom and looked at the bar, the picture was
somehow funny, but she was way too nervous to smile. There, sitting at the
bar, on one stool, was Tom. On the other stool right beside him, was Ashley.
They had their backs to each other and both had their arms crossed over
their chest.
Kirstin shook her head, took a deep breath and stepped forward them.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

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Hello everyone!

     Ok... so i'm sending chapter 19 tonight. But I wanna tell you guys that
I need more reviews than what I got last time to keep sending a chapter per
day, alright? So... REVIEW!! My email addy is yourfanfic@... and my
guestbook is at http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     This chapter is kinda... blah! But there are some sweet parts in there.
You'll see...
     GTG, but TTYL!
     Love
     Fernanda

--------------

~*~ Chapter 19 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – FEB. 15TH, 2001 – Wednesday

             Ashley turned around on the bed and opened his eyes. He smiled
seeing Kirstin sleeping beside him. She looked so peaceful. After their talk
the night before, things between them were pretty good and she asked him to
sleep with her. Grace, who had gone to sleep on the couch after Ashley’s and
Kirstin’s talk, had left earlier that day.
             Ashley brushed a lock of Kirstin’s hair away from her face and
took a better look at her. ‘God, I love her!’ he thought to himself.
             Then Kirstin woke up when she sensed a pair of eyes staring at
her.
             “Hey…” she said while stretching.
             “Hey, baby.” Ashley pecked her lips softly.
             “Hm…” Kirstin smiled at his eyes “Where’s Grace?” Kirstin sat up
and looked downstairs.
             “She’s not down there, so I’m assuming she left already.”
             “Yeah. She probably went to college. Man, I’ve missed so many
classes. I’m gonna have to talk to the dean about that.”
             “I’m sure he’ll understand when you explain him the situation.”
             “Yeah…” Kirstin lay down again “But I have to go to work. Oh,
man. Have to tell Andrew all about it.”
             “It’ll be fine.” Ashley caressed her belly.
             “What are you doing?” Kirstin smiled at his touch.
             “Nothing.” Ashley continuing doing what he was doing.
             “Yes, you’re doing something.” Kirstin still had the smile on.
             “No, I’m not.” Ashley looked up at her, but was still caressing
her belly.
             “You’re caressing the baby!” Kirstin pointed out.
             “No, I’m not.”
             “Yes, you are!”
             “No, I’m not. I’m caressing you!”
             “No, you’re caressing the baby. You loooove it, don’t you?”
Kirstin joked with Ashley.
             “Oh… shut up.” Ashley grinned and returned to his sleeping
position.
             “No. Because you looove the baby already.”
             “Ok, ok, I admit it. I’m starting to get fond of it.”
             “Oh, that’s so sweet, baby.” Kirstin kissed his lips gently and
placed her head on his chest.
             “Yeah, ok. Let’s just drop it, alright?” Ashley couldn’t hide
his embarrassment.
             “Ash, there’s nothing to be ashamed of. You can confess you’re
starting to like the baby already. That’s alright.”
             “I already told you I am. So let’s just change the subject,
alright?” Ashley sounded serious.
             “Ok… Sure.” Kirstin didn’t want to upset him, so she agreed to
his terms “I gotta call Tom.”
             “Oh, you’re calling him today?” Ashley frowned.
             “Yeah… I thought the sooner the better, you know? Just get it
over with.”
             “Yeah… guess you’re right.” Ashley took a deep breath.
             “So… I think I’m gonna call him now. Later he’ll be on his way
to work, so…”
             “Ok. Call him then.”
             “Ok, let me go downstairs. I’ll be right up.”

             Kirstin headed downstairs to talk to Tom and Ashley went to the
bathroom and decided to take a shower.
             When he got out of the bathroom, Kirstin was getting changed to
go to work. He embraced her from behind.
             “Hey.” he said, kissing her neck.
             “Hey, silly.” she turned to look at him, but they were still
embraced “Hm… just a pink towel, huh?”
             “Yeah. Hope you don’t mind I took your towel. There was no other
one.”
             “Not a problem. I like it.” Kirstin smiled a bit.
             “You do, don’t you? I thought you would.” Ashley smirked.
             “Oh, you know me too well.” Kirstin pressed her lips into his
and they kissed passionately.
             “So… how was it with Tom?” Ashley asked when they broke apart
from the kiss.
             “Oh, yeah.” Kirstin continued to get changed and Ashley started
doing the same “We’re meeting tonight. He got the night off from Luna and we
thought of meeting tonight.”
             “Did you tell him what it was about?”
             “No, he was surprised to hear from me.”
             “Yeah, well…”
             “So, I told him we needed to talk about some stuff that I’d
rather not discuss over the phone and he understood, telling me he’d have
this night off, so…”
             “Did you tell him about us?”
             “No…” Kirstin looked at Ashley “Didn’t feel the need to. You’re
gonna be there tonight, so… He’ll know.”
             “Yeah…” Ashley looked down and laced his tennis shoes “I bet he
has no idea of what this conversation will be about.”
             “Yeah, well… who would know?”
             “Yeah…”
             “Listen, I gotta get to work now. But can you come here around 7
so we can go to the restaurant?”
             “Sure… 7?” Ashley asked Kirstin.
             “Yeah.”
             “Ok. No problem.”
             “Do you have work to do today?” Kirstin asked him.
             “Yeah. But I think it’s just some radio stuff. No studio today.”
             “Good. Then we’ll meet here and then we go.”
             “Yeah. Ok.” Ashley looked at the mirror and started to work on
his hair.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Heeeeellloooooo people!

     So, ok, I'm back. And I little earlier than expected. So some people
might be happy about that. And some might not.
     I got SO MANY reviews for chapter 17! Oh, I can't even thank you guys
enough! Thanx so much! I can't really tell you how happy I got when I got
home from my trip and saw all those reviews on my email box! THANKS SO MUCH!
You guys rock!
     I'm sending chapter 18 now. Hope you guys like it. Some people got mad
at me for leaving for vacation with a cliffhanger, so this chapter won't
have a cliffhanger, alright? LoL
     Also, do NOT forget to send me those wonderful feedbacks I love so much!
You guys have been so great with them, let's not ruin that, alright? LoL So,
the email addy is yourfanfic@... or sign my guestbook at
http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     I GTG, but we'll talk soon!
     Love
     Fernanda

-------------

~*~ Chapter 18 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – FEB. 14TH, 2001 – Tuesday

Now Ashley was the one staring at Kirstin as if he hadn’t understood a word
she had just said. He stood like that for a while, with a frown on his face.
How could she not want what he had just proposed?
“K, I know you think you can raise this baby on your own, but I don’t
think…”
“Ash, can you just… shut up for a while?” Ashley stopped talking and stared
at Kirstin “First of all, I know I can raise this baby by myself. I know it
won’t be easy, but I never really thought it would be, so… I am prepared. As
weird as it may sound, I am prepared for that. Second…” Kirstin took a deep
breath before continuing “This is hard. I… I really felt… relieved when you
told me you’d be willing to help me with the baby. It would be so much
easier if you were by my side. But then you started talking and talking and
I realized something. You don’t accept the baby. You accept me. And as long
as you have me, you’re willing to get everything else that comes with me.
And that’s not really what I want. I want this baby to be loved. If I’d
raise it with you, I’d want you to be a father. A real father. I’d want you
to love him. But as I noticed, that’s not what you’re willing to do. You’re
willing to raise it as long as I come along. And that’s all. I know you will
never see this child beyond the ‘Waiter boy’s baby’ label. And that’s not
what I want. I don’t want you to feel angry every time you look at this
child. Because that’s not its fault. That’s just… wrong. And I don’t want
that.”
Kirstin got Ashley speechless. Maybe he was thinking all those things when
he decided he’d take care of the baby. But how could she know? Was it that
obvious? But… was that what he was really thinking?
“Kirstin, I…” Ashley started to play with his fingers “I don’t know what to
say. I can’t really tell you none of that crossed my mind, because it did.
But I’d like you to give me a chance. If you accept me and accept me taking
care of this child, raising it with you, then I really think I can love this
baby. It will be ours. No matter what happens, it will be ours. We’re gonna
be the parents. And I’m not as cold as ice, I will love it. All I ask of you
is some time to get used to the idea. Because all my life I imagined me
marrying you first and then having kids. My own flesh and blood. But I am
willing to give up my dreams to be with you. I may not be willing to do this
for the baby just yet, but you gotta understand me here. All I can say is
that I know I’ll love it eventually, so, can give me this time?” Ashley
looked straight at her. Kirstin’s eyes were watery and she felt like crying.

“Ash… If all you’re saying is true and…”
“It is the truth.” Kirstin got interrupted by Ashley “I promise.” Kirstin
looked deep into Ashley’s eyes and she knew he was telling the truth.
“I… I think I… I can give you this time. Because I really want you by my
side right now. No one else but you.” a tear drop from her left eye. Ashley
wanted to help her with her baby. What else could she ask for?
Ashley got up and so did Kirstin. They kissed passionately until Kirstin
broke it with a worried look on.
“What?” Ashley asked already concerned.
“It’s just that…” Kirstin had to say something that Ashley would not
understand “I think I… no, I don’t think. I will… I’ll tell… I have to tell…
Tom about it. About the baby. Because it is his, you know? He gotta know
about it.”
For a second, Kirstin closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip, thinking
Ashley would scream at her. But that didn’t happen.
“Ok.” Ashley said after taking the information in and Kirstin opened her
eyes “I think you’re absolutely right. He has to know about the baby.”
Kirstin’s jaw even dropped a bit. How could Ashley have changed so much? He
would never accept that.
“Really?” Kirstin asked incredulous.
“Of course. One way or another, it is his baby. So you gotta tell him.”
“I can’t believe you’re actually agreeing to this.” Kirstin hugged him.
“K, baby, look at me.” Kirstin, still hugging Ashley, looked up at him. He
brushed a lock of hair away from her face “I’m not always gonna agree with
you, but I’ll always be there for you. So, don’t worry. I understand it.”
“Thank you, Ash.” Kirstin hugged him even tighter.
“But, listen, I have one condition.”
“Yeah?” Kirstin asked, already worried. What would that be?
“That I go with you when you tell Tom about it.”
“Ok. That’s not a problem. Not at all.” Kirstin breathed relieved. That
would be even better if Ashley was there with her. Then Tom would see they
are happy together and not even Tom’s child could tear them apart.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hello Hello!

     I'm really dissapointed at you guys! Come on!!! I want reviews! If I
dont get enough reviews, I'll start sending one chapter every 3 days! So...
come on!
     BTW, thanx Taryn and Stacie for correcting my terrible erros! Love ya!
     So... here's chapter 13. It's kinda tense too. New discoveries... Some
people will not like them, but... what can I do? And Katie. I HATE YOU! And
you'll see why when you're done reading this! LoL
     Anyways... review!! Please! Review!!! My email addy yourfanfic@...
br or guestbook http://myfanfictionsite.cjb.net
     Love!
     Fernanda

------------------------------

~*~ Chapter 13 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – FEB. 13RD, 2001 – Tuesday

             It was 7 pm. Kirstin had just arrived from her job. She
collapsed onto the couch and started crying. She had spent the rest of the
previous day just like that too. She was worried with the results she would
get on the following day.
             Grace then unlocked the door, entered the loft and saw her
friend lying on the couch, crying uncontrollable.
             “K, baby. Please, don’t be like that.” Grace already knew about
everything. She had spent the night at Kirstin’s to support her friend and
she’d spend that night there as well.
Kirstin didn’t say a thing. She just placed her head on Grace’s lap and
cried. Grace stayed there with her, not saying a thing. It was a tough thing
to go through so young. It probably was nothing, but Kirstin had to prepare
herself for the worst, being the pessimist she was. She couldn’t find
anything good about that. Even if it was an ulcer or gastritis, it was bad.
Not equally bad, but it was not good. So she’d suffer either way. And she
didn’t want to go through that. She was too young to have an ulcer,
gastritis or cancer!
“K, have you called your parents yet?” Grace asked while brushing a lock of
hair away from Kirstin’s face. Kirstin just shook her head “Good. It’s
better this way. You should find out what it is first before calling them.
You shouldn’t worry them with something that might not even be there.” Grace
brushed another lock away from Kirstin’s face and kissed her on the cheek
“Everything will be fine. You’ll see.”


    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – FEB. 14TH, 2001 – Wednesday

             Grace left at 8 am because she couldn’t miss class. She had to
take the notes for both, her and Kirstin.
             At 10 am, the phone rang.
             “Hello?” Kirstin answered.
             “Hello. Can I please talk to Ms. Addams?” a female voice asked.
             “This is she.” Kirstin frowned.
             “Hello, Ms Addams. This is Dr. Bristow’s secretary. I’ll pass
the call to him, is that alright?”
             “Yeah, ok.” Kirstin got more worried. What was it now? What did
Dr. Bristow have to say to her that couldn’t wait until their appointment at
2 pm?
             “Hello? Ms. Addams?” an older male voice asked.
             “Yes.”
             “This is Dr. Bristow. How are you, dear?”

             It was 11:45 am when Ashley arrived at Kirstin’s loft. He rang
the bell and Kirstin ran to open the door to him.
             “Hey.” Ashley greeted, worried.
             “Hey.” Kirstin turned and headed to the leaving room, pacing
around it.
             “What’s wrong?” Ashley didn’t like Kirstin’s behavior or look.
It seemed like she had been crying the whole day and had just stopped.
             “Dr. Bristow called.” she informed, stopped walking around and
looked at Ashley.
             “What? Why?” Ashley trailed to Kirstin “Why did he call if we
have an appointment at 2?”
             “He said that way we’d save a trip.”
             “What do you mean?” Ashley asked worried. Kirstin continued to
pace around the room. After a few moments in silence, Ashley snapped “What’s
going on, Kirstin?”
             “He told me over the phone what I have.”
Now it was Ashley’s stomach that was hurting. He had to sit down. She knew
what was wrong with her and she wouldn’t tell him already! He had to know!
He was suffering too much! Was it cancer? If it was cancer, would she be as
calm as she was? But she wasn’t calm. She was more… worried. Not sad.
Worried.
“What is it, Kirstin? What is the fucking problem?” Ashley snapped and stood
up “Is it cancer?” Kirstin looked at him with no expression on her face “Is
it? If it is, just say it, alright? I can take it!” Ashley let a tear fall
down his cheek. Kirstin didn’t notice it, because she turned her back to him
before that “Kirstin, for the love of God, what’s going on? You’re killing
me here!” Ashley couldn’t take it anymore.
“It’s not cancer.”
“So, it’s an ulcer?” Ashley breathed relieved. An ulcer wasn’t such a big
deal. His father had an ulcer.
“No.”
“Then what is it?” he got worried again.
“It’s… I… it’s… I don’t know how to say, so I’ll just say it, alright?”
Ashley just nodded. He had to know already “It’s… pregnancy.”
“What?” Ashley didn’t even raise his voice. He couldn’t believe it.
“I’m pregnant.” Kirstin looked down.
“Oh, my God!” he then stopped to think “Oh, my God!” he said louder “We
weren’t safe the last time we had sex! Oh, my God! How could I have been so
stupid? I mean…”
“Ash?”
“I was so… surprised at the whole thing that I even forgot to put the condom
on and…”
“Ash?”
“But, K, I mean…” Ashley got closer to Kirstin “Wow… I… I don’t even know
what to say. It’s not something that I was expecting, but…we can…” Ashley
walked away from Kirstin “We can do this. I mean. It’s only gonna be born in
what? 8 months or so? Until then, the record will be out and I think things
are gonna slow down a bit. Things will be easier. If the baby was due to
this week, then things would be difficult, but no…” Ashley was now talking
more to himself than to Kirstin “We still have 8 months. Everything will be
fine. Don’t worry, Kirstin. I’ll take care of you. Don’t worry. We have 8
months.” Ashley got closer and embraced her.
“No, we don’t.” Kirstin pulled back from him.
“What do you mean, no we don’t?”
“We only have 6 months.”
“6 months? No, that’s not…” Ashley stopped and looked at Kirstin.
“The baby is not yours. It’s Tom’s.”

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Hey!

     So... as promised... Chapter 10. Hope you all like this one too!
     Reviews: yourfanfic@... or guestbook at http://myfanfictionsite
cjb.net
     Love
     Fernanda

--------------

~*~ Chapter 10 ~*~

    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – JAN. 26TH, 2001 – Saturday

             It was 3 pm when the door bell rang. Kirstin ran from her room
to get it.
             “Hey, you!” Ashley greeted happily, hugged her and spun her
around.
             “Oh, hey.” Kirstin was happy too. Ashley was home.
             “So, how are you?” Ashley asked as they headed to the couch.
             “Good. You?”
             “Just a bit sad for leaving you today.”
             “Yeah. I’m not happy about that either.” Kirstin played with her
fingers.
             “So, K, about coming back. The doctor’s appointment is gonna be
on the 7th, and I don’t know if I’m gonna be able to come back before that.
Things are pretty hectic right now, we’re meeting a lot of producers and
recording so many things. It’s really crazy.”
             “I understand. Really, Ash.” Kirstin looked up at him. He seemed
to be telling her the truth. Why would he lie, anyway? She couldn’t find a
reason for him to lie to her.
             “Good. I thought you were gonna be mad at me.” Ashley felt
relieved.
             “No, Ash, I won’t. I already told you, from the beginning. I
won’t mind you being away because of your work. I understand that’s what you
do and what you like to do. Don’t worry about me not understanding. Of
course I’ll be sad every time you leave because I’ll feel alone. But I know
it won’t be good for you either, because you’ll also be alone. Not alone,
but… not with me. You’ll be sad too, right?” Kirstin looked at him hopeful.
             “Of course, baby! I miss you so much! Every single minute of
every passing hour that we’re not together!” Ashley kissed her for the first
time that day. When they pulled apart, Kirstin smiled.



    NEW YORK CITY, NY – SHOPPING MALL – JAN. 26TH, 2001

They spent the rest of the afternoon at the movies. Kirstin wanted to bring
the female voice subject up, but she never found the right time to do it.
And maybe she was just imagining things. Maybe that was just a voice from
some girl that worked in the studio. She was pretty sure it was nothing. But
still, it worried her. A lot.


    NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – JAN. 26TH, 2001

             It was 8:30 pm when Ashley and Kirstin got home from their date.
             “So, what time do you have to leave?”
             “In about 15 minutes. Our plane leaves at 11.”
             “Oh… ok.” Kirstin turned her back to him and seemed lost as
where to go.
             “Kirstin, are you alright?” Ashley placed both his hands on her
shoulders.
             “Yes, I mean… why wouldn’t I be?” Kirstin asked without turning
around.
             “I don’t know. That’s why I am asking you that.”
             “No, I’m fine. Really.” she tried to play cool, but Ashley
didn’t believe her.
             “K, I know something’s going on. I noticed it all day long. In
fact, I’ve noticed it since yesterday’s phone call. What’s the problem,
baby?” Ashley turned her around so she’d look at him.
             “It’s just that… when we were talking, you… when you hung up…
ahm… before that I… I heard a… a girl in the background.”
             “Yes…” Ashley frowned. He didn’t know where she was getting at.
             “And I… who was she?”
             “Who was who?” Ashley still had the frown on.
             “The girl in the background, Ashley. The girl talking to you in
the background.”
             “I don’t know. It could have been anyone.”
             “What? What do you mean it could have been anyone?” Kirstin
frowned too.
             “We were at the studio. A lot of women work there. And we’re
working with a lot of female producers, so… it could have been anyone.”
             “No, I didn’t hear anyone else in the background. Just she was
talking. And she sounded too friendly, actually.”
             “K, I seriously don’t know what you’re talking about. Maybe it
was a producer that called me up to go back to the booth. I don’t know.”
             “Ash, are you kidding here? Because if you have something to say
  just… say it, alright?” Kirstin sounded serious.
             “Yes, I do have something to say.” Ashley looked down and
Kirstin’s heart started biting rapidly when she heard those words. So he had
something to tell her. So he had done something. She was afraid she wouldn’t
like to hear what was to come “All I have to say is that… I love you,
alright? Are you afraid there’s someone else?” Ashley grinned.
             “Don’t smile, alright? It’s serious. Yes, of course I’m worried.
You’re always surrounded by girls, how should I know if something happened
if I’m not there?”
             “K, baby, listen.” Ashley still had the grin on. He found that
amusing somehow “I love you and only you. There’s no chance in hell I’d be
with someone else! You’re the only one I want to be with. You have
absolutely nothing to worry about. Not with me. I know you must be
traumatized by what that jerk did to you, but I’m nothing like him. I’d have
to die first before I hurt you. So don’t worry, sweetie. There’s no one else
and there never will be.”
             “Can you… promise me that? Like… now?” Kirstin ran her fingers
through his chest.
             “I thought I had already promised to be faithful to you when I
placed that ring on your finger. I’m yours. But if you need me to promise, I
promise.”
             “Good.” Kirstin grinned and kissed him softly “That’s all I
wanted to hear.”
             “Can I expect the same thing from you?”
             “Of course!”
             “Can you promise me that as well?” Ashley asked seriously.
             “I promise there’s only you in my life.” Ashley smiled big and
kissed her passionately.
             “Listen, I gotta go now, or else I’ll be late and Mike will kill
me, alright?” Ashley pulled back from the kiss.
             “Alright. Sure. I’ll walk you to the door.”
             Kirstin opened the door and Ashley trailed to the elevator,
pushing the button.
             “No goodbyes, alright?” Kirstin asked Ashley.
             “Of course. No goodbyes. I’ll be back as soon as possible, ok?”
             “Ok. I love you.”
             “I love you too.”
They kissed passionately again and then Ashley disappeared into the elevator
  It took a while for Kirstin to close the door and go to bed.


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