Top Ten thoughts to ponder

Number 10 - Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9 - Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one
can die.

Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see Him
without
an erection, make him a sandwich!

Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a
person
to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

Number 6 - Some people are like a Slinky..... not really good for
anything,
but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the
stairs.

Number 5 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in
hospitals
Dying of nothing.

Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays
no
attention to criticism.

Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred
dollars and
a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?


Number 2 - In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird.
Now the
world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2005
We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among
the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a
clue as to
where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located.
Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of
immigration and the war on terror!