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Disclaimer: No one, especially Arty, is responsible for injury or death caused while reading this email newsletter. Continue at your own risk.
Other Disclaimer: All characters in this email are actual. Any similarity to fictional beings, dead or otherwise, is purely intentional.
Ok, first thing's third: You have received this email because you signed an email list somewhere, either by choice or force, or your address was bought from the African Scam people. Either way, you don't have a snowball's chance in Hawaii of getting off the list now. If you wish to stop receiving this email, change your email address and tell no one...
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Welcome back to me (Arty) and yes, I had a lovely trip. I have noticed the massive increase in the size of the email list over the month of May. UG wants to thank everyone for your continued support during their down time and for making Troy and Adam feel welcome. I personally would like to say howdy to all the new recipients of the newsletter. So... "Howdy."
Ok, are your seatbelts on? Alright: "Let's go!"
IN THIS ISSUE:
I) Website Update (http://come.to/unevenground)
II) Upcoming Shows (more appropriately: are there any upcoming shows?)
III) UG member makes a deal with Mattel
IV) Cover Song Poll Update
V) Memories of Singapore (uh... May Gigs)
VI) Inspirational Note
VII) Foreign Babble of The Month
I) WELL, WELL, WELL, the website has been updated. A little bit in the news section and (drum roll or near facsimile): there are pictures. Not many, but thanks to the Marshwiggle Roadie, there are some cool shots from Freedom Fest in Parry Sound. Look for the Pix link from the main page or the news section. Also be sure to sign the guestbook and visit the comments section. http://come.to/unevenground
II) SO UG PLAYED like 4 million times in May... where are all the June dates? Well, UG is getting it's house in order and so will not be travelling a lot in June. Look for some local shows though. So far the band has only confirmed June 28 @ the Woodstock Upper Deck. Gigs waiting to be confirmed for June are Tillsonburg, Simcoe and POSSIBLY Brantford. Watch for UG to unleash a nightmare amount of dates for Summer and early fall. All you east-coasters, the band may be back for a visit.
If you'd like to have UG come out and rip it up in a town near you, email ugbooking@...
III) MOVE OVER KEN, Barbie's got a new man! Early this week UG bassist, Adam Lavender, inked a deal to become the new "Man Doll" in Barbie's life. Evidently the whole "Macho-Athlete-Clean-Cut-Vacant-Stare" thing has driven Barbie fans to boredom. Watch for the doll to hit shelves sometime, somewhere. Adam was in competition with Lars Ulrich (Metallica) for the new position, but Adam was much cheaper... and much taller. Plus... as if Barbie would date a drummer!
IV) THE POLL FOR UG's retro-cover-tune is winding down. Evidently a good part of the Uneven Ground Fan Base didn't even recognize a number of the tunes. Vote anyway! The Top 3, as of this moment, are: 3rd - To Be With You (Mr. Big); 2nd - Empire (Queensryche); AND 1st - 18 and Life (Skid Row). So get over there and vote, time is running out!
V) AH... MEMORIES OF MAY... sounds like it'd be a nice book or something, eh? Well these are the highlights of the May Gigs as I've been told them. They may only make sense if you were there...
- The little family reunion in Norwich.
- All The Hype - Sunburn, Broken Basses, Making Money by exploiting the autographs of Thousand Foot Krutch...
- The Huge Body Guard Posse in Toronto, learning the do's and do not's of coolness from Kris Stinson, humongous crowds, Kevin the prophet of doom and cigarettes, the catacombs beneath in which hid the potty...
- Ottawa - Awesome breakfast, Bob and Doug, another music store, an enthusiastic crowd, a killer PA and THE COMMERCIAL featuring UG. Way cool!
- PARRY SOUND and the Bobby Orr Centre - Lot's of noisy Freedom Fest goers, missing singers, showers in the Hockey Change rooms, NO SLEEP!
VI) INSPIRATIONAL NOTE
In the battle to live an awesome, free, joyful life, we sometimes fall down. Whether you are a Christian or not, you know what it's like to get punched in the face by life. No one ever claimed it wouldn't be tough.
How many of the times we get beaten up, have we brought it on ourselves by ignoring that tug in our heart to refrain from some action or to get away from a certain situation? That's called conviction. That's God's Holy Spirit saying "LOOK OUT!" Sometimes we turn a deaf ear though. Doing that enough we will effectively squash our spirit's sensitivity.
Have you ever been in a noisy room, trying to talk to someone? One of two things can happen. You can concentrate to stay tuned in to the person with whom you are speaking or you can become so distracted you give up. Sometimes staying tuned in means getting away from the distraction, to another place.
As we try to stay focused on that inner voice or "tug" the commotion around us, especially that provoked by the enemy specifically to distract us, grows louder. Fight to maintain your heart's sensitivity.
As you battle temptations to move in ways you feel you shouldn't, or maybe even KNOW you shouldn't, remember these words: "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." Those words are found in the New Testament of the Bible. Specifically 1st Corinthians 10:13
Remember that the enemy comes to steal from you, kill you and destroy you by dragging your soul away. Jesus has come so that you may have life and have it to the fullest!
If you don't understand this "religious mumbo jumbo" and want to know more, or even discuss any of the band member's lives, email them at UGlovesyou@...
UG cares about all of you very much and can't wait to see you all again! Never give up the fight! Never surrender! Seek Truth!
VII) SORT OUT WHAT this says and we'll send you a free piece of UG toast!
"Der grosse grüne Fisch speiste in Peru. Warum? Traurig war er, weil er nichts sonst hatte zu tun."
Email translations to saywhatUG@...
Well, that's it folks! Hope you all made it this far!
This R. T. Fufkin saying... uh... later.
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