Here's the message (I know! I know! I'm a wee bit behind.
Everyone - tell your friends, family and everyone you know to sign up
at the bottom of the message at:

http://www.nikkershaw.net

Tuesday, October 28, 2003

At last, my muse has returned, albeit in a rather dishevelled state.
She seems a bit tetchy and hasn't unpacked her bags yet. Not sure
whether she's staying. I think she may have commitment issues,
something to do with childhood gerbil trauma.

Anyway, re forthcoming Album!

Having never released an album over the net I am confronted with a
problem I've never had to deal with before: How many Albums do I get
pressed? One million or one thousand? Do I get David Hockney to
design the sleeve or do I use one of my son's Pokemon drawings? And
what about staff? Do I employ hundreds of skilled packers to rush the
millions of CDs off to the four corners of the earth, or do I buy a
couple of books of first class stamps and a damp sponge?

Indeed, I'm constantly haunted by two nightmare scenarios:

a) Not enough Albums are pressed - panic buying ensues - hordes of
rabid Nik Kershaw fans riot in the streets - World markets crash -
U.N. Security Council meets - China vetoes French resolution calling
for special edition box set - George Bush grows comedy moustache and
invades Poland

b) Too many Albums are pressed - garage full of CDs - nowhere to park
my big red tractor mower.

In order that neither of these horrors occurs, we at Shorthouse
records thought it rather a good idea to get some kind of mailing
list together. A revolutionary concept I know, but one which will
give us some idea as to the numbers involved.

So, if you would be interested in receiving information regarding the
release of the up and coming album, please place your email address
at the bottom of the page. Don't worry, it'll be our little secret.
No one need ever know you're a Nik Kershaw fan and only very few of
you will receive unsolicited mortgage offers or advice on increasing
the size of your penis. (It doesn't work, by the way!)

Hugs and kisses (and strong, manly handshakes),

Nik