Among other things, not least that she is a showgirl on the Italian weather channel Che Tempo Fa, the former model and TV hostess is Mrs Francesco “Il Bello” Totti. The glamour couple may have very little to talk about when they are together, since he has barely mastered Italian and prefers to communicate in Roman dialect. The, ahem, Totti totty married the Roma captain in 2005 when already pregnant in a ceremony that was broadcast live on Italian television. But the former free spirit (there are nearly-nude pictures in circulation, apparently) may currently be under house arrest, since she and Totti now have a son named Christian. Mr Traditional — whose lack of intellectual capacity was underlined when a raft of Totti jokes (they included the gem “ The three hardest years for Totti? Class one of elementary school”) was printed and whose childhood ambition was to become a petrol pump attendant — explained that his first-born had to be male, so the famous Totti legacy would continue. To the horror of the medical establishment, the Tottis insisted Christian was born under water. Nobody knows why.

 

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