I, too, am very sorry to hear all that you went through. Even though
we're just random people on the Internet, do know that others are
hoping for you to have the strength to make it through this, and if we
can help, just let us know.

Fuzzy

On Wed, Jul 2, 2008 at 6:05 PM, betsybird_3000 <no_reply@yahoogroups.com> wrote:
> Thanks Patti.
>
> I'm at one of those "calm" periods, after lots of hysterical times
> over the last few weeks. It isn't even a month.
>
> The whole thing was a horror, from the moment the surgeon charged out
> of the OR and announced "There was nothing I could do for him. He had
> cancer all throughout his stomach. (he meant torso, and yes I know
> i'm not a Doctor, but I DO know the difference.)"
>
> He was talking about Scott in the past tense, and he was NOT DEAD at
> that point.
>
> The Dr.'s made this a nightmare more than it already was!!!!! The
> nurses and support staff were, for the most part, great.
>
> Fortunately, we all had time with Scott to tell him how much we cared
> about him. He got lots of visitors and messages and love. We felt so
> positive he would live, but the old positive thinking b.s. won't
> change a thing when the body is under such an assault.
>
> Before he died, I got to say "I love you" and he said "I love you."
> Not everyone has that enormous luxury!!!!!
>
> The emergeny folks then took him out to the ambulance and he passed
> away without pain.
>
> He was a great man and I'm sooooo lucky to have known him and
> infinetly blessed that I was his wife. I loved him very much--still
> love him! And, it's been hell.
>
> I have lots of challenges ahead of me, and I'm completely frightened
> and not looking forward to life without that magnificent man!
>
> His death is wrong. It isn't fair. But it just IS and it hurts beyond
> my ability to put it into words.
>
> Thanks! Everyone in my life has been incredibly supportive and I
> would not be still standing if it were not for our incredible
> friends.
>
> Scott was a HUGE Rush fan, and I'm finally reading their drummer Neil
> Peart's book about when he lost his 19 y.o. daughter to a drunk
> driver and then a year later, lost his wife of 22 years to cancer. He
> dealt with it by getting on his motorcycle and just GOING. He stayed
> at crappy hotels and visited old friends, wrote a journal and spent
> time figuring out how and why he would want to live again.
>
> Over the holiday, I'm spending some time with the folks that have
> been friends from the beginning (more like family) who actually got
> us together, played a little matchmaker and all. They've been close
> friends ever since, and their son was with me when I got that ton of
> bricks news dropped on me (and of course, Scott) when the Doctor
> blurted out his own problems, of how he couldn't do it, etc.
>
> It's a nightmare!!! Or rather, I wish it were. The worst thing about
> this: I will survive. I don't want to, but I will.
>
> I just spent a few days with Scott's brother, nephew, mom and my
> sister in law, who is wonderful. It was sad, but I needed to be with
> them and out of this big house, that only reminds me of how much I
> love my husband.
>
> Thanks everyone,
> Love,
> Betsy