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18369
Bob Farrior
luckiebob2000
Dec 1, 2005 2:29 pm
What can I say?. Needs help. Good Luck Bob Farrior Nives Hannie <nivespower@...> wrote: what r u guys talkin' about exactly!?!??! J Heery...
18370
soapdogg@...
gilpin_railr...
Dec 1, 2005 2:42 pm
This one is not striking a cord with me, I guess i dont really understand about singing to the tree is there a metaphore that could suggest something other...
18371
soapdogg@...
gilpin_railr...
Dec 1, 2005 3:08 pm
what about instead of fancied-up maybe rolling-up or something different. I think the song is awesome, yet that word doesnt seem to fit to me. Also " She...
18372
J Heery
HeeryIs
Dec 1, 2005 3:35 pm
Generally: I like how this rhymes the use of partial rhymes like 'long' and 'gone'. My main reservation is that it is slightly too nice. You only hint at the...
18373
ron kerst
ron_kerst
Dec 1, 2005 3:43 pm
Ty for your comment...well I was trying to keep it clean.after all kids listen to radio too..lol I see your p[oint though..ty for the comment. one more...
18374
J. Davidson
brianjean2000
Dec 1, 2005 5:09 pm
Does anyone know the song which contains the line: I am falling through the middle of time? TIA Jackie [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]...
18375
Nives Hannie
nivespower
Dec 1, 2005 5:37 pm
ok..um, nice. ..... wierd..... Bob Farrior <luckiebob2000@...> wrote: What can I say?. Needs help. Good Luck Bob Farrior Nives Hannie...
18376
Keith Hale
iwordsmithy
Dec 1, 2005 7:06 pm
That's the whole point, it's supposed to be weird new age stuff about communing with trees etc. It's big in the states,people go for the weekend, leave their...
18377
Michael J Fisher
walrustalk1
Dec 1, 2005 7:16 pm
Wow. I'm the total opposite. I'm disappointed if I didnt give the listener room to move and interpret in their own way. I feel the responsibilty to keep it...
18378
crystal cannon
lo_alana_fem...
Dec 1, 2005 8:51 pm
I really like this, poem but i think that you need to give it some more details.. and add a lil taste to it and give it some flava.. he he but so far it really...
18379
Bob Farrior
luckiebob2000
Dec 1, 2005 9:05 pm
I think you have the makings of a good song. However some times a song can be to long.you may want to do some re-writing and try leaving out some of the words....
18380
Bob Farrior
luckiebob2000
Dec 1, 2005 9:14 pm
Very good words.each song should follow a path. cover each part of your step as you go down the path.the end result should be a complete story.Good Luck Bob...
18381
Bob Farrior
luckiebob2000
Dec 1, 2005 9:23 pm
Really like the words. You might trying a re-write and leave out some of the (don't need words).Good Luck. Bob Farrior Keith Hale <keithhale25@...>...
18382
Bob Farrior
luckiebob2000
Dec 1, 2005 9:44 pm
I think you have the making of a very good song. I would do a lot of re- writing but I sure would not quit on it,EVER. Good Luck. Bob Farrior "A. Warner...
18383
Bob Farrior
luckiebob2000
Dec 1, 2005 9:54 pm
Some very good thoughts show here. just keep to it, the name of the game is re write, re write and re write. Good Luck. Bob Farrior Keith Hale...
18384
Keith Hale
iwordsmithy
Dec 1, 2005 10:33 pm
You're right, I'm going to re-write it, there's some things I've gone off now. Also I'll take on board some other suggestions. I'm too busy with work to do it...
18385
Keith Hale
iwordsmithy
Dec 1, 2005 10:42 pm
This could be a very good song, but needs a bit of a re-work. 'An animation of mind would be very hard to sing and doesn't flow very well. How about 'Living...
If we start off as friends then us as a couple would be even more special If we can gain trust with one another now then the trust would be 'unbreakable' If we...
18388
Desirea Nestlerode
sweetdesirea
Dec 2, 2005 12:37 am
time for me to be me Verse 1 i cried and you laughed at me it took so long for me to see you were clingy - never left me alone always waitin for me by the...
18389
Pacific Songwriting C...
pacific_song...
Dec 2, 2005 3:10 am
Pacific Songwriting Competition is offering an opportunity of a = lifetime for songwriters ! Sony BMG has confirmed it will be on the New Zealand stand at...
18390
ron kerst
ron_kerst
Dec 2, 2005 3:29 am
Thanks, Great news..maybe a success story of sorts..This song was just picked up out of Nashville....Thanks Group! Bob Farrior <luckiebob2000@...> wrote:...
18391
Steve Cooke
comradecooke
Dec 2, 2005 4:48 am
Well, I'm not even going to read it until you learn to use the return key on your computer keyboard and start dividing your lyrics into separate lines and...
18392
ron kerst
ron_kerst
Dec 2, 2005 2:23 pm
I agree with S.C. 100%...You need some structure here for sure! Also think about rewriting this and rhyme.every other line. Put it in a poem form and try...
18393
Chris
gilpin_railr...
Dec 2, 2005 3:19 pm
this song is kind of a spoof, yet there is alot of meaning about the cd project im doing currently. Its supposed to be a fun bluesy feel! WE AINT PRETTY BUT...
18394
Bob Farrior
luckiebob2000
Dec 2, 2005 4:41 pm
Looks like you have a good song started. A word in a song shouldn't be made to fit. It should fit into the other words you have used. You may want to consider...
18395
Keith Hale
iwordsmithy
Dec 2, 2005 6:49 pm
Yeah, I'll read it when it's divided into verses, punctuated and you can actually read the flow of the words. Why should I waste my time trying to decipher...
18396
Keith Hale
iwordsmithy
Dec 2, 2005 6:53 pm
It's not bad at the moment and pretty funny, needs a bit of re-wring though to get it sharp. Maybe ZZ Top would like to do it, LOL ! ... the ... feel!...
18397
Sam Pearlman
topthedoc
Dec 2, 2005 7:19 pm
Check Out These 2 New Christmas Songs "The Santa Clause Rock" and "By Christmas Day" 1) Hear The Santa Clause Rock at .......... ...
